1 00:00:01,897 --> 00:00:04,738 Yeah, and it was called Man from Atlantis, and he had like, webbed fingers... 2 00:00:04,739 --> 00:00:06,765 Kyle, Kenny! I have to talk to you right now! 3 00:00:06,766 --> 00:00:07,739 Ok, hang on a second I- 4 00:00:07,740 --> 00:00:08,681 RIGHT NOW, GODDAMNIT! 5 00:00:08,682 --> 00:00:10,096 All right, all right! 6 00:00:11,004 --> 00:00:12,983 Dude, what is the matter with you? 7 00:00:13,187 --> 00:00:15,905 Trent Boyett is being released from Juvenile Hall. 8 00:00:16,765 --> 00:00:17,570 (WHAT??) 9 00:00:17,571 --> 00:00:19,572 Trent Boyett?? The kid from preschool?? 10 00:00:19,573 --> 00:00:21,204 Yeah. He just got paroled. 11 00:00:22,052 --> 00:00:23,364 Oh no! NO! 12 00:00:24,215 --> 00:00:25,976 Hey gaybots, what's goin' on? 13 00:00:26,264 --> 00:00:28,460 Trent Boyett is being released from Juvenile Hall. 14 00:00:28,461 --> 00:00:30,030 Really? That's cool. When did-? 15 00:00:31,322 --> 00:00:32,562 What did you say? 16 00:00:33,033 --> 00:00:35,391 Trent Boyett? Meanest, dirtiest, toughest kid in the world, 17 00:00:35,392 --> 00:00:37,354 super-pissed off at US Trent Boyett?? 18 00:00:37,355 --> 00:00:38,073 Yeah. 19 00:00:38,657 --> 00:00:40,244 Oh, Holy Jesus, God is... 20 00:00:40,654 --> 00:00:42,041 What the hell are we gonna do?? 21 00:00:42,176 --> 00:00:44,763 Hey, is it true?? Trent Boyett is getting out?? 22 00:00:45,131 --> 00:00:46,066 It's true. 23 00:00:46,252 --> 00:00:48,709 Oh Jesus, Oh Christ in Heaven, I gotta hide! 24 00:00:50,482 --> 00:00:52,141 Uh, oh boy! 25 00:00:55,134 --> 00:00:57,140 He's gonna come for us, you guys. We are dead men. 26 00:00:57,141 --> 00:01:01,066 Look, m-maybe he's forgiven us. I mean, we were only in preschool 27 00:01:07,672 --> 00:01:09,259 Dude, let's play Fireman. 28 00:01:09,954 --> 00:01:12,005 Totally, dude, let's play Fireman. 29 00:01:12,534 --> 00:01:14,357 Jews can't be firemen. 30 00:01:14,855 --> 00:01:16,051 Shut up, fatass! 31 00:01:16,562 --> 00:01:18,678 Don't call me fat, you stupid Jew! 32 00:01:19,393 --> 00:01:21,070 (How about we put a real fire out?) 33 00:01:21,071 --> 00:01:25,416 Hey, Kenny's right. We should put out a real fire. Then we'll be heroes! 34 00:01:25,568 --> 00:01:27,281 But how do we start a fire? 35 00:01:28,030 --> 00:01:31,915 Trent Boyett will do it. He's the toughest, baddest kid in preschool! 36 00:01:33,365 --> 00:01:34,344 Say Encore! 37 00:01:34,561 --> 00:01:35,579 Encore! 38 00:01:36,163 --> 00:01:37,142 Say Encore! 39 00:01:37,260 --> 00:01:38,422 Encore! 40 00:01:40,127 --> 00:01:42,008 What do you shitheads want?! 41 00:01:42,302 --> 00:01:44,373 Do you know how to start a fire? 42 00:01:45,071 --> 00:01:47,280 Sure! I burn lots stuff. 43 00:01:47,582 --> 00:01:49,778 Start one. Then we're gonna put it out. 44 00:01:49,967 --> 00:01:51,076 We're firemen! 45 00:01:51,802 --> 00:01:54,585 Do you fuckheads even know how to put out a fire? 46 00:01:55,287 --> 00:01:57,527 Yeah yeah, we play Fireman all the time. 47 00:01:58,055 --> 00:01:59,389 Don't worry, Trent. 48 00:02:00,354 --> 00:02:01,721 All right, fine. 49 00:02:05,061 --> 00:02:07,127 Hey fellas, you'd better be careful. 50 00:02:07,720 --> 00:02:10,164 Shut up, Butters! We know what we're doing! 51 00:02:10,621 --> 00:02:11,948 Oh, all right then. 52 00:02:14,625 --> 00:02:15,569 Wow, cool! 53 00:02:16,113 --> 00:02:18,121 Code 7! Bring in the firemen! 54 00:02:18,507 --> 00:02:21,210 Woowoowoowoo, Clang clang clang clang clang! 55 00:02:21,360 --> 00:02:23,549 Come on, firemen! Put out the fire! 56 00:02:26,666 --> 00:02:27,732 We're heroes! 57 00:02:28,153 --> 00:02:29,523 We saved the school. 58 00:02:31,690 --> 00:02:32,669 Put it out! 59 00:02:32,953 --> 00:02:35,106 Trent Boyett, what have you done now?! 60 00:02:35,144 --> 00:02:36,560 They said they could put it out. 61 00:02:36,561 --> 00:02:38,322 Children, get back away, now! 62 00:02:41,642 --> 00:02:43,043 AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! 63 00:02:43,160 --> 00:02:44,581 I'm buuurniiing! 64 00:02:45,695 --> 00:02:47,195 Put it out, put it out! 65 00:02:55,887 --> 00:02:58,692 Come on, hurry! We've gotta get her to the hospital! 66 00:03:00,620 --> 00:03:03,122 Dude, we are in so much trouble! 67 00:03:03,123 --> 00:03:04,928 My mon is gonna break my legs! 68 00:03:04,976 --> 00:03:08,086 Hey, we didn't start the fire, Trent Boyett did. 69 00:03:08,675 --> 00:03:09,697 That's true. 70 00:03:10,639 --> 00:03:13,792 You boys! Trent is trying to tell us the fire was YOUR idea. 71 00:03:14,085 --> 00:03:14,628 No! 72 00:03:15,020 --> 00:03:16,564 Not us. We're good kids. 73 00:03:17,118 --> 00:03:20,026 Tell them it was an accident: you thought you could put it out. 74 00:03:20,027 --> 00:03:22,626 Trent Boyett is a liar, sir. 75 00:03:22,965 --> 00:03:25,580 I thought so. All right, that's it, Trent. 76 00:03:25,581 --> 00:03:28,125 You're going to Juvenile Hall for a long time! 77 00:03:28,131 --> 00:03:30,501 Butters, you saw! Tell them what happened! 78 00:03:30,898 --> 00:03:34,820 Ah, I'd do you in, Trent. Ah, I don't wanna get involved. 79 00:03:34,821 --> 00:03:36,972 Or else my parents will ground me. 80 00:03:37,180 --> 00:03:40,264 You'd better pray I never get out of Juvenile Hall! 81 00:03:40,265 --> 00:03:42,213 You'd better ALL pray! 82 00:03:45,914 --> 00:03:49,456 Dude, when he gets out of Juvenile Hall, he's gonna wanna kill us! 83 00:03:50,040 --> 00:03:53,350 Whatever. That's like five years from now. 84 00:03:53,484 --> 00:03:54,735 Yeah, who cares? 85 00:03:55,127 --> 00:03:58,336 All right, yeah, woohoo, we did it! 86 00:04:00,712 --> 00:04:03,952 Now it's five years later. And Trent Boyett is being released. 87 00:04:04,108 --> 00:04:06,866 Oh Jesus, he's gonna kill us. We-we've gotta tell our parents! 88 00:04:06,867 --> 00:04:09,348 We can't tell our parents, dude! We lied to everybody! 89 00:04:09,349 --> 00:04:11,316 Nobody knows we're responsible for Ms. Claridge's accident! 90 00:04:11,317 --> 00:04:13,339 Sshhh, here comes Ms. Claridge now. 91 00:04:15,961 --> 00:04:17,331 Hello, Ms. Claridge. 92 00:04:19,867 --> 00:04:22,107 Are you having a nice day, Ms. Claridge? 93 00:04:27,111 --> 00:04:28,813 You guys, what the fuck are we gonna do?! 94 00:04:28,814 --> 00:04:30,958 In case you've forgotten, Trent Boyett is the meanest kid we ever knew. 95 00:04:30,959 --> 00:04:32,105 He's gonna tear us apart! 96 00:04:32,106 --> 00:04:36,041 Look, that was a long time ago. Maybe Trent Boyett has forgotten all about it. 97 00:04:58,148 --> 00:05:02,214 Everything that you had when you were first brought in here will now be returned. 98 00:05:03,480 --> 00:05:06,432 One Crayole eight-pack with crayon sharpener. 99 00:05:07,318 --> 00:05:09,705 One pair of plastic round-tipped scissors. 100 00:05:10,874 --> 00:05:12,815 One marble, blue. 101 00:05:14,917 --> 00:05:15,917 And one... 102 00:05:16,588 --> 00:05:21,826 switchblade knife with "Kill all betrayers" written on the blade, black. 103 00:05:26,854 --> 00:05:29,189 Trent! Where are you gonna go? 104 00:05:30,653 --> 00:05:32,782 I gots business to take care of. 105 00:05:41,722 --> 00:05:42,337 Hah! 106 00:05:44,295 --> 00:05:45,143 Butters? 107 00:05:47,492 --> 00:05:49,374 Hullo. Oh, uh hi Dad. 108 00:05:50,373 --> 00:05:52,308 Butters, what is wrong with you?? 109 00:05:52,723 --> 00:05:54,349 Nothin' wrong, sir. Eh nothin' at all. 110 00:05:54,810 --> 00:05:56,969 You've been shut up in your room for days, Butters. 111 00:05:56,970 --> 00:05:58,862 You need to go outside, go play. 112 00:05:58,945 --> 00:06:01,367 Uh... outside? No way! 113 00:06:01,644 --> 00:06:02,492 Why not? 114 00:06:02,720 --> 00:06:03,786 N- no reason! 115 00:06:03,831 --> 00:06:05,751 Butters, we have had it with your moping around! 116 00:06:05,752 --> 00:06:08,081 You're gonna go outside and you're gonna play, right now! 117 00:06:08,082 --> 00:06:10,235 But Dad, I just wanna stay in my room- 118 00:06:14,408 --> 00:06:15,517 Butters, play! 119 00:06:17,309 --> 00:06:19,331 Start playing right now, young man! 120 00:06:33,646 --> 00:06:36,293 Tru... Tr-Trent Boyett! HAAA! 121 00:06:37,235 --> 00:06:39,663 Dad! Mom! I'm don- I'm done playin' now! 122 00:06:42,420 --> 00:06:44,215 AAAAAH! Let me in, Dad! 123 00:06:45,859 --> 00:06:47,838 Mom, Dad, you gotta open the door! 124 00:06:47,959 --> 00:06:50,068 What on earth is the matter with him? 125 00:06:50,114 --> 00:06:53,686 Just keep the door locked, honey. Butters can't be a house hermit his whole life. 126 00:06:53,687 --> 00:06:56,709 Oh my God, he's coming! Oh here oh my gosh he's gonna kill me! 127 00:06:56,710 --> 00:07:00,341 I just can't stand to hear him scream like that. I'm gonna go upstairs. 128 00:07:01,243 --> 00:07:04,657 Mom, Dad, you gotta open the door right now! You've gotta open it- 129 00:07:08,044 --> 00:07:11,374 Oh hey! Trent Boyett Gosh I... haven't seen you in a whle. 130 00:07:13,108 --> 00:07:16,174 Five years. It's been five long miserable years. 131 00:07:16,715 --> 00:07:20,998 Look, Trent, I know- I know you're awful sore about... pre- muh- pr-preschool and all, 132 00:07:21,181 --> 00:07:24,438 but... well that was a long time ago. I mean, we were just kids. 133 00:07:25,690 --> 00:07:28,803 Uhhh... p-lease don't hurt me, Trent. I- I'll give you anything you want. 134 00:07:28,804 --> 00:07:29,553 You name it! 135 00:07:29,554 --> 00:07:32,228 Can you give me back my time? Huh? Can you do that?? 136 00:07:32,229 --> 00:07:35,251 Kindergarten, first grade, second? Can you give me that?? 137 00:07:36,338 --> 00:07:39,491 Well, no, Trent, I- I'm not like a time-traveler or nothin'. 138 00:07:39,539 --> 00:07:42,456 I'm gonna give you something you didn't give me: a five-second head-start. 139 00:07:42,529 --> 00:07:44,988 No, Trent, I I ain't gonna run. We can talk this through. 140 00:07:44,989 --> 00:07:45,513 Four seconds! 141 00:07:45,514 --> 00:07:47,123 Uh Trent, now, listen to me. I'm sorry for the color- 142 00:07:47,124 --> 00:07:47,768 Three seconds! 143 00:07:47,769 --> 00:07:48,922 Ohhh yamuckers! 144 00:07:53,118 --> 00:07:55,808 Thanks so much for coming to visit Butters in the hospital, boys. 145 00:07:55,809 --> 00:07:57,266 It means a lot to him. 146 00:08:01,827 --> 00:08:03,411 What happened to him, Doctor? 147 00:08:03,412 --> 00:08:06,479 >From the test results, it would appear your child was tortured by a bully. 148 00:08:07,137 --> 00:08:08,775 He received a massive snuggie, 149 00:08:08,776 --> 00:08:11,138 his underwear pulled up so high it nearly killed him. 150 00:08:11,139 --> 00:08:13,987 He also received two Indian sunburns on his forearms, 151 00:08:14,371 --> 00:08:17,420 a charlie horse on the thigh, and a second-degree titty twister. 152 00:08:17,421 --> 00:08:19,028 And from the damage to his head area, 153 00:08:19,029 --> 00:08:21,979 it appears he was also given a swirly, a colossal one. 154 00:08:24,102 --> 00:08:28,482 It also appears like he received a noogie, and, a Polish bike ride. 155 00:08:29,100 --> 00:08:30,122 What's that? 156 00:08:30,203 --> 00:08:33,095 We aren't sure. We only know that... there is no cure. 157 00:08:33,362 --> 00:08:34,993 If only we had let him in! 158 00:08:35,152 --> 00:08:38,348 Why didn't we let him inside the house when he was screaming for help? 159 00:08:38,349 --> 00:08:40,371 Now, honey, we were trying to read. 160 00:08:40,598 --> 00:08:43,539 We've got to tell them who did this, you guys. We're gonna get it as bad as Butters! 161 00:08:43,540 --> 00:08:45,187 That's nothing compared to what my mom will do to me 162 00:08:45,188 --> 00:08:47,501 if she finds out I've been lying for five years! 163 00:08:47,502 --> 00:08:50,560 Maybe you didn't hear so good in there, Kyle! Second-degree titty-twister! 164 00:08:50,561 --> 00:08:52,687 Calm down guys, we don't have to go tell our parents. 165 00:08:52,688 --> 00:08:54,527 We just need to go out and get some protection. 166 00:08:55,015 --> 00:08:57,255 How the hell are condoms gonna help us?! 167 00:08:59,191 --> 00:09:00,909 Sorry, heh. Never mind, heh. 168 00:09:02,086 --> 00:09:05,323 I'm talking about hiring somebody bigger than Trent to protect us from him. 169 00:09:05,324 --> 00:09:06,172 Come on! 170 00:09:11,436 --> 00:09:13,295 I'm gonna jump the wall of fire. 171 00:09:17,205 --> 00:09:18,619 Yeah, that was sweat! 172 00:09:19,732 --> 00:09:20,863 Hey, look! 173 00:09:23,096 --> 00:09:24,616 Dude, we shouldn't be here! 174 00:09:24,617 --> 00:09:28,857 Stay cool, guys. If anybody can protect us from Trent Boyett, it's the sixth graders. 175 00:09:28,890 --> 00:09:30,651 Stupic little Fourthies! 176 00:09:43,917 --> 00:09:46,950 What are you little Fourthies doin' in our hangout?! 177 00:09:48,628 --> 00:09:50,870 We've come to... ask you for help. 178 00:09:51,512 --> 00:09:52,317 Help??? 179 00:09:55,772 --> 00:09:58,369 We need you to protect us... from a bully. 180 00:09:58,825 --> 00:10:01,053 Yeah? And what do we get for it? 181 00:10:03,275 --> 00:10:04,993 A twelve-pack of Dr. Pepper, 182 00:10:06,118 --> 00:10:08,662 A Shoots & Ladders game used only three times, 183 00:10:09,218 --> 00:10:10,675 DVD of Harry Potter 2, 184 00:10:11,356 --> 00:10:13,157 and a coupon for a free side of fries 185 00:10:13,158 --> 00:10:16,006 with a purchase of any deloxe hamburger at Red Robin. 186 00:10:16,334 --> 00:10:17,791 All this can be yours. 187 00:10:21,222 --> 00:10:24,027 You're gonna have to do better than that, Fourthies! 188 00:10:24,650 --> 00:10:25,351 Well... 189 00:10:25,352 --> 00:10:26,443 Well, what do you want? 190 00:10:26,444 --> 00:10:28,403 You're Stan Marsh, right? 191 00:10:29,490 --> 00:10:30,152 Yeah. 192 00:10:30,153 --> 00:10:31,676 OOOOOoooOoOooo! 193 00:10:33,409 --> 00:10:35,832 We want a picture of your mom's boobs! 194 00:10:36,103 --> 00:10:38,039 Yeah. Awesome. 195 00:10:38,459 --> 00:10:39,131 WHAT?? 196 00:10:39,132 --> 00:10:41,219 Your mom has the sweetest bewbs ever. 197 00:10:41,220 --> 00:10:43,634 Yeah! I totally wanna suck your mom's tits. 198 00:10:43,890 --> 00:10:44,869 Dude, weak! 199 00:10:44,979 --> 00:10:47,393 Come back with a naked picture of your mom! 200 00:10:48,737 --> 00:10:49,223 NO! 201 00:10:49,962 --> 00:10:51,636 Then we aren't helpin' you! 202 00:10:52,193 --> 00:10:53,768 Wait! We'll do it. 203 00:10:54,457 --> 00:10:56,765 It'd have to be a good picture, too! 204 00:11:00,578 --> 00:11:02,235 So long, Fourthies! 205 00:11:07,278 --> 00:11:11,787 Ok, so now we just need to get a picture of Stan's mom naked. Cool. 206 00:11:20,931 --> 00:11:23,345 That's the preschool teacher, Ms. Claridge. 207 00:11:23,429 --> 00:11:26,768 Poor woman suffered such horrible burns she can only communicate by... 208 00:11:26,769 --> 00:11:28,922 beeping once for yes and twice for no. 209 00:11:31,266 --> 00:11:33,680 Oh hello, Ms. Claridge. Nice day, isn't it? 210 00:11:35,034 --> 00:11:37,404 Need help across the street, Ms. Claridge? 211 00:11:39,013 --> 00:11:40,383 Well all right then. 212 00:11:54,153 --> 00:11:55,455 Ms. Claridge, you all right? 213 00:11:58,093 --> 00:12:01,960 You can talk to me, Ms. Claridge. I understand: one beep for yes and two for no. 214 00:12:01,961 --> 00:12:04,635 Don't you think you should get out of the street? 215 00:12:05,946 --> 00:12:09,273 Look you, you don't have to be so cold. I'm just trying to help. 216 00:12:11,299 --> 00:12:13,093 Oooo, sorry! 217 00:12:26,707 --> 00:12:28,666 Can Kyle come out and play? 218 00:12:29,356 --> 00:12:31,378 Oh, Kyle isn't home right now, hon. 219 00:12:32,017 --> 00:12:33,257 Thank you, ma'am. 220 00:12:38,542 --> 00:12:40,852 You see, Mom, all the kids at school were told to bring 221 00:12:40,853 --> 00:12:43,503 a picture of their moms' breasts for anatomy class. 222 00:12:43,625 --> 00:12:45,917 I don't know, son. That sounds awfully strange. 223 00:12:45,918 --> 00:12:47,927 You cannot have a picture of my hot breasts. 224 00:12:47,928 --> 00:12:49,003 But mom, my teacher will- 225 00:12:49,004 --> 00:12:50,248 Nononono, you gotta go 226 00:12:50,249 --> 00:12:51,906 "But Mo-o-o-om. " 227 00:12:53,266 --> 00:12:54,527 But Mo-o-o- 228 00:12:54,528 --> 00:12:56,558 "But Mo-o-o-om. " 229 00:12:56,945 --> 00:12:57,948 This is hopeless! 230 00:12:57,949 --> 00:12:59,486 Why don't you just sneak in your mom's closet 231 00:12:59,487 --> 00:13:01,080 and get a picture when she's changing clothes? 232 00:13:01,081 --> 00:13:03,437 That's sick, dude! I'm not taking a picture of my mom's boobs! 233 00:13:03,438 --> 00:13:04,040 (I'll do it.) 234 00:13:04,041 --> 00:13:05,501 No, you're not doing it either! 235 00:13:05,502 --> 00:13:07,994 We just need to find something that looks like boobs to take a picture of. 236 00:13:07,995 --> 00:13:10,191 What else has big round squishy globes? 237 00:13:12,223 --> 00:13:15,416 Draw the um- You guys draw the nipples like on the bottom of my asscheecks. 238 00:13:15,417 --> 00:13:17,352 No, the nipples are more in the middle, see? 239 00:13:17,353 --> 00:13:20,545 Yeah, but Stan's mom is old; that means her nipples sag more to the bottom now. 240 00:13:20,546 --> 00:13:21,533 How do you know?! 241 00:13:21,534 --> 00:13:23,349 Will you guys trust me? I know this stuff! 242 00:13:23,350 --> 00:13:24,546 All right, fine. 243 00:13:28,763 --> 00:13:30,304 Oh wait! We forgot the necklace. 244 00:13:30,305 --> 00:13:31,240 (Oh yeah!) 245 00:13:39,695 --> 00:13:41,152 God I hope this works. 246 00:13:45,726 --> 00:13:46,661 Escuse me! 247 00:13:47,709 --> 00:13:49,036 Whattaya want now?! 248 00:13:49,606 --> 00:13:50,935 We, we got it. 249 00:13:51,901 --> 00:13:54,054 You got a picture of your mom's bewbs? 250 00:13:54,239 --> 00:13:55,044 No way! 251 00:14:00,556 --> 00:14:02,164 Hey, hold on a second! 252 00:14:03,225 --> 00:14:05,865 These are like the hottest tits I've evern seen! 253 00:14:06,335 --> 00:14:07,966 - Whoa! - Check them out! 254 00:14:08,069 --> 00:14:09,135 Give me that! 255 00:14:09,587 --> 00:14:12,259 Whoa! I knew she had a hot rack! 256 00:14:12,467 --> 00:14:14,393 Yeah. Sure does. Uh-huh! Uh-huh! 257 00:14:15,174 --> 00:14:16,805 Oh yeah, those are so hot. 258 00:14:16,819 --> 00:14:18,174 Oooohhh 259 00:14:20,272 --> 00:14:23,077 Ok, so now you'll help us take care of Trent Boyett? 260 00:14:23,367 --> 00:14:27,793 Oh all right, we'll let this Trent Boyett know that if he messes with you, 261 00:14:28,010 --> 00:14:29,461 he's messin' with us! 262 00:14:29,897 --> 00:14:30,772 All right! 263 00:14:30,773 --> 00:14:33,391 You guys, we're free! We haven't a care in the world! 264 00:14:33,392 --> 00:14:34,414 (All right!) 265 00:14:34,418 --> 00:14:37,004 I need three minutes alone with the picture behind the bushes. 266 00:14:37,005 --> 00:14:39,447 I get to take the picture behind the bushes after you. 267 00:14:39,448 --> 00:14:41,427 I'm takin' it to the bushes first! 268 00:14:42,896 --> 00:14:45,136 Dude, are we gonna be like that someday? 269 00:14:45,557 --> 00:14:46,231 Naw. 270 00:14:51,452 --> 00:14:54,106 Man, I would have loved to seen to seen the look on Trent Boyett's face 271 00:14:54,107 --> 00:14:55,624 when all the sixth graders showed up! 272 00:14:55,625 --> 00:14:58,648 Yeah. Trent's just lucky he didn't mess with us. I woulda kicked his ass. 273 00:14:58,649 --> 00:15:00,802 Hey, look. What is Ms. Claridge doing? 274 00:15:02,393 --> 00:15:03,459 Ms. Claridge? 275 00:15:03,764 --> 00:15:08,300 She won't talk to anybody, boys. Some say... she's just given up hope. 276 00:15:12,675 --> 00:15:15,024 Hey guys, you know what we should do? We should go get a- 277 00:15:15,025 --> 00:15:15,786 Hwuh?! 278 00:15:26,446 --> 00:15:30,642 Jesus Christ, I've never seen so many Indian sunburns and titty twisters in my life! 279 00:15:30,835 --> 00:15:32,648 Get a cold towel on that pink belly! 280 00:15:32,649 --> 00:15:34,302 Doctor, we have another snuggie here 281 00:15:34,303 --> 00:15:35,282 Over there! 282 00:15:38,851 --> 00:15:39,903 Another wet willie? 283 00:15:39,904 --> 00:15:40,934 Worst one yet. 284 00:15:40,935 --> 00:15:41,935 It's all... 285 00:15:44,608 --> 00:15:46,500 Give the poor kid some morphine. 286 00:15:48,302 --> 00:15:49,672 Dude, what happened? 287 00:15:50,151 --> 00:15:53,069 We... told him not to mess with you guys... 288 00:15:53,070 --> 00:15:55,503 We told him... you paid us. 289 00:15:55,504 --> 00:15:57,507 Oh, Jesus. You told him that?! 290 00:15:58,390 --> 00:16:02,290 Boys, you have to let him rest. Some mean kid gave him a Texas Chili Bowl. 291 00:16:02,769 --> 00:16:03,613 What's that? 292 00:16:03,614 --> 00:16:06,462 It involves Tabasco sauce, a telephone, and the anus. 293 00:16:07,759 --> 00:16:10,357 I don't know what kind of kid would do this to other people; 294 00:16:10,358 --> 00:16:14,161 I only know that I wouldn't ever want to be on that kid's bad side. 295 00:16:17,080 --> 00:16:20,233 We're dead. Trent knows we send the sixth-graders after him. 296 00:16:20,450 --> 00:16:22,777 He's gonna give us all Texas chili bowls. 297 00:16:23,372 --> 00:16:26,180 We've gotta move away. We've gotta get as far away from this town as possible! 298 00:16:26,181 --> 00:16:27,882 No, no, we've just gotta find better help. 299 00:16:27,883 --> 00:16:32,123 From who? We can't ask adults for help and there's nobody tougher than sixth graders. 300 00:16:32,951 --> 00:16:34,544 There is... one person. 301 00:16:42,105 --> 00:16:42,827 Shelley? 302 00:16:42,828 --> 00:16:45,024 Shut up, turd! I'm watching television! 303 00:16:48,111 --> 00:16:51,428 Shelley, you're my sister, right? And families... depend on each other. 304 00:16:51,429 --> 00:16:54,588 I said shut up, or I will destroy you, tur-r-rd! 305 00:16:55,950 --> 00:16:56,755 Shelley 306 00:16:56,949 --> 00:17:00,440 Somebody is going to kill me, and I can't go to Mom or Dad for help, 307 00:17:00,441 --> 00:17:03,683 so, you're kind of the only person I have... left. 308 00:17:10,939 --> 00:17:13,093 STOP CRYING, TURD!! 309 00:17:13,914 --> 00:17:15,545 Now, who's gonna kill you? 310 00:17:16,038 --> 00:17:18,376 Trent Boyett. He just got released from Juvenile Hall. 311 00:17:18,377 --> 00:17:21,454 He was sent there for burning Ms. Claridge, but actually, it was our fault. 312 00:17:21,455 --> 00:17:23,490 Oh, you are such stupid turds. 313 00:17:23,584 --> 00:17:25,057 We were only four years old at the time, uh. 314 00:17:25,058 --> 00:17:27,215 We du-we didn't think about the past coming back to haunt us then. 315 00:17:27,216 --> 00:17:28,631 We didn't think and now he's gonna kill us! 316 00:17:28,632 --> 00:17:33,666 Calm down, turd! No Juvenile Hall turd is going to kill you. That's my job. 317 00:17:33,829 --> 00:17:35,261 So you're gonna help us? 318 00:17:35,262 --> 00:17:37,719 Yes, but I'm gonna want something in return. 319 00:17:38,005 --> 00:17:39,458 A picture of your mom's boobs? 320 00:17:39,459 --> 00:17:42,873 SHUT UP, TURD! You're going to admit to Ms. Claridge what you did! 321 00:17:43,152 --> 00:17:44,431 Admit it was our fault? 322 00:17:44,432 --> 00:17:48,461 You can't run from your past, turds. Apologize and make amends. 323 00:17:48,462 --> 00:17:50,876 Then I'll protect you from this Trent turd. 324 00:18:02,540 --> 00:18:05,780 Ms. Claridge, the people in town are really worried about you. 325 00:18:08,227 --> 00:18:12,685 Look, if you're having some kind of problem, you have to be able to talk to people. 326 00:18:15,373 --> 00:18:19,654 Just tell us this: do you trust that we want what's best for you, yes or no? 327 00:18:22,343 --> 00:18:26,061 All right, fine! But someday you're gonna have to learn to let people in! 328 00:18:27,479 --> 00:18:28,240 Bitch. 329 00:18:32,848 --> 00:18:35,696 Hi, Ms. Claridge. Uh, we have s-someting to tell you. 330 00:18:37,641 --> 00:18:40,980 The thing is, Ms. Claridge, we did a lot of stupid things when we were kids. 331 00:18:41,314 --> 00:18:43,317 A lot of stupid things that we regret. 332 00:18:43,318 --> 00:18:45,427 (And it's time for us to come clean.) 333 00:18:47,041 --> 00:18:51,020 See, Ms. Claridge, when we were little, we used to play with our weiners a lot, 334 00:18:51,030 --> 00:18:52,992 and one game we played was "Fireman. " 335 00:18:53,656 --> 00:18:55,287 I've been lookin' for you! 336 00:18:56,559 --> 00:18:58,769 Firve years I've been waitin' for this day. 337 00:18:58,770 --> 00:18:59,986 AAAAAAAAH! 338 00:19:00,730 --> 00:19:02,703 Trent, look: We've realized our mistake! 339 00:19:02,704 --> 00:19:04,635 Yes, our conscious got the best of us and, 340 00:19:04,636 --> 00:19:06,782 and we were just about to tell everyone the truth. 341 00:19:06,783 --> 00:19:08,392 You had five years to do that. 342 00:19:08,393 --> 00:19:12,302 And while I wasted away my time in prison you've been enjoying nice, normal lives! 343 00:19:12,303 --> 00:19:14,426 Our lives have not been enjoyable, Trent! I promise you! 344 00:19:14,427 --> 00:19:16,779 Don't tell me that! I heard about the things you've done! 345 00:19:16,780 --> 00:19:19,635 But there WERE no magical Christmas adventures or talking poo for me! 346 00:19:19,636 --> 00:19:22,376 I didn't get to fight a huge mechanized Barbra Streisand like you did! 347 00:19:22,377 --> 00:19:25,182 No accidental trips to Afghanistan for Trent Boyett! 348 00:19:25,574 --> 00:19:27,026 Stay away from us, Trent! 349 00:19:27,027 --> 00:19:27,727 What is that? 350 00:19:27,728 --> 00:19:29,964 It's my mom's taser. I took it from her purse. 351 00:19:29,965 --> 00:19:31,292 Just back off, man! 352 00:19:32,326 --> 00:19:34,394 Look, just take your punishment! You deserve it! 353 00:19:34,395 --> 00:19:36,376 Let me have my retribution and it can be over with. 354 00:19:36,377 --> 00:19:39,617 I am NOT going to have a titty twister! I hate titty twisters! 355 00:19:39,798 --> 00:19:41,864 You don't even know how to use that! 356 00:19:51,857 --> 00:19:52,531 Wow! 357 00:20:16,680 --> 00:20:20,224 So, Trent, you just had to finish off your old preschool teacher, eh? 358 00:20:20,369 --> 00:20:21,565 No! They did it! 359 00:20:22,924 --> 00:20:24,642 Trent Boyett is a liar, sir. 360 00:20:26,238 --> 00:20:28,782 Ms. Claridge, did Trent Boyett do this to you. 361 00:20:30,983 --> 00:20:33,098 Yes yes. Take him away! 362 00:20:33,099 --> 00:20:34,947 Naw! You've gotta listen to me! 363 00:20:36,231 --> 00:20:38,197 Dude, when he gets out he's gonna be really mad! 364 00:20:38,198 --> 00:20:40,138 Whatever, that's like five years from now. 365 00:20:40,139 --> 00:20:41,095 Yeah, who cares? 366 00:20:41,096 --> 00:20:42,356 Yeah, woohoo 367 00:20:42,357 --> 00:20:43,292 We did it! 368 00:20:44,427 --> 00:20:46,362 So long, Trent! Have a nice time! 369 00:20:46,552 --> 00:20:48,052 Nyanyanyanyanyaaanyaaa! 370 00:20:48,610 --> 00:20:50,010 Hahahahahaaahaaa! 371 00:20:52,597 --> 00:20:54,054 Hey, hold on a second! 372 00:20:54,493 --> 00:20:55,165 Uh oh. 373 00:20:55,166 --> 00:20:56,007 Bewbs! 374 00:20:56,182 --> 00:20:57,039 Omigod! 375 00:20:57,708 --> 00:20:58,406 Boobs! 376 00:20:58,407 --> 00:20:59,456 I'm taking them to the bushes! 377 00:20:59,457 --> 00:21:01,523 I'm taking them to the bushes first! 378 00:21:02,420 --> 00:21:04,225 WilLoW:...) January 24th, 2005