1
00:00:09,514 --> 00:00:10,415
What the heck?

2
00:00:10,416 --> 00:00:12,059
Whoa! What a huge package!

3
00:00:12,633 --> 00:00:16,859
" To Butters Stotch. "
Oh boy! It's for me! It's for me!!

4
00:00:17,214 --> 00:00:19,715
"Sent from: Japan. Konichi-wa. "

5
00:00:19,925 --> 00:00:22,207
Wow! A package for me from Japan!!

6
00:00:23,288 --> 00:00:26,441
Wow, what can it be?
My birthday isn't until September 11th.

7
00:00:27,522 --> 00:00:31,892
Oh boy! I've never gotten a package this big!
I've always wanted to have a huge package.

8
00:00:39,689 --> 00:00:42,562
Greetings. I am the AWESOM-O 4000.

9
00:00:44,827 --> 00:00:45,976
Whoa...

10
00:00:46,600 --> 00:00:50,470
I have been sent from Japan to serve
as your personal robot.

11
00:00:51,045 --> 00:00:53,715
You... you're my robot?

12
00:00:53,867 --> 00:00:56,216
Yes. I will be your new best friend.

13
00:00:56,503 --> 00:00:57,534
Oh wow!

14
00:00:59,468 --> 00:01:02,746
Yep. That's right. He's a real live robot.
He can walk and talk and everything.

15
00:01:02,747 --> 00:01:05,074
You're like the fourth kid I told already.

16
00:01:06,068 --> 00:01:09,047
Well I gotta go Dougie.
My robot and I have stuff to do.

17
00:01:09,347 --> 00:01:11,152
Heheh, they're all so jealous!

18
00:01:11,307 --> 00:01:15,345
I'm so glad you came into my life, AWESOM-O.
You're the best friend a guy could have.

19
00:01:15,346 --> 00:01:20,585
Yes. You can trust AWESOM-O. In fact, you should
tell AWESOM-O all your most personal secrets.

20
00:01:20,855 --> 00:01:24,921
AWESOM-O will not make fun of you or tell
your secrets to other people and stuff.

21
00:01:24,929 --> 00:01:27,582
Hey yeah! Well I can tell you anything, huh?

22
00:01:28,017 --> 00:01:32,068
Well lessee... Well, for one, I have
what's called a heziated colon

23
00:01:32,232 --> 00:01:34,619
which means I sometime can't control
my sphincter.

24
00:01:34,620 --> 00:01:35,512
Could be.

25
00:01:36,124 --> 00:01:40,624
Well, nobody knows it, but sometimes I poop
my pants, so I have to wear a diaper to school.

26
00:01:41,556 --> 00:01:42,806
You okay, AWESOM-O?

27
00:01:42,807 --> 00:01:45,275
Yes. AWESOM-O is fine.
Please go on.

28
00:01:45,486 --> 00:01:47,648
Well, I have to take medicine for it every day.

29
00:01:47,649 --> 00:01:50,584
It's a little suppository I have to... put up my rectom.

30
00:01:51,417 --> 00:01:54,967
That, that's very interesting.
Tell AWESOM-O more secrets.

31
00:01:55,220 --> 00:01:56,547
Hm, okay. Let's see

32
00:01:56,639 --> 00:02:00,475
Oh, my parents don't know, but sometimes
I get picked on by this one kid at school.

33
00:02:00,476 --> 00:02:03,735
his name is Eric Cartman, and he always
tries to play jokes on me and stuff.

34
00:02:03,736 --> 00:02:04,716
Oh, really?

35
00:02:04,869 --> 00:02:07,403
Yeah. One time he made me think
a meteor had hit the earth,

36
00:02:07,404 --> 00:02:10,065
and convinced me to stay down
in a bomb shelter for three days.

37
00:02:10,066 --> 00:02:11,942
Heh. Wow, that sucks.

38
00:02:12,246 --> 00:02:15,937
Yeah. And then this other time, he pretended
to be me on the phone to my dad

39
00:02:15,938 --> 00:02:18,917
and called him a pussy,
so my dad came home and beat me.

40
00:02:18,920 --> 00:02:21,675
Wow. Sounds like this Cartman kid is pretty smart.

41
00:02:21,844 --> 00:02:24,127
No, he's not smart! He's just an asshole.

42
00:02:24,354 --> 00:02:26,889
And he's never gonna play on me ever again!

43
00:02:27,143 --> 00:02:28,647
Really? You think so?

44
00:02:29,017 --> 00:02:31,788
Well, guess what, Butters.
I have a surprise for you.

45
00:02:31,789 --> 00:02:33,529
Yeah, and he's never gonna get me again!

46
00:02:33,530 --> 00:02:36,900
Cause what Cartman doesn't know is that I know one of his secrets!

47
00:02:37,671 --> 00:02:38,389
What?

48
00:02:38,515 --> 00:02:40,644
When Cartman is playing all alone in his backyard,

49
00:02:40,645 --> 00:02:43,787
he likes to dress up like Britney Spears
and pretend he's her!

50
00:02:43,788 --> 00:02:47,506
Hi sings and dances around with a
life-sized cutout of Justin Timberlake.

51
00:02:48,468 --> 00:02:49,534
You saw that?

52
00:02:49,634 --> 00:02:51,700
Yeah! And I videotaped him doing it!

53
00:02:52,711 --> 00:02:55,015
- Nuh uh.
I've got the whole thing on tape!

54
00:02:55,016 --> 00:02:57,774
Even him making out with the Justin Timberlake cutout!

55
00:02:57,775 --> 00:02:58,549
No way.

56
00:02:58,550 --> 00:03:02,766
Yeah! And if Cartman ever messes with me again,
I'm gonna show that video to everybody!

57
00:03:02,767 --> 00:03:04,920
Then I'll Ihave my revenge, boy howdy!

58
00:03:05,514 --> 00:03:07,968
...Um, where is this videotape, Butters?

59
00:03:08,424 --> 00:03:10,706
Huh? Oh, I dunno. It's around here somewhere.

60
00:03:10,707 --> 00:03:12,572
Hey! So what do you wanna do now, AWESOM-O?

61
00:03:12,573 --> 00:03:15,802
Uh, Butters, maybe you should give AWESOM-O the videotape?

62
00:03:15,962 --> 00:03:16,720
How come?

63
00:03:16,721 --> 00:03:20,171
Well, because... AWESOM-O can, like,
back it up for you

64
00:03:20,321 --> 00:03:22,804
, and make copies and stuff.
I am AWESOM-O.

65
00:03:23,008 --> 00:03:26,900
Oh, that's all right, AWESOM-O.
Come on! I have a lot of things to teach you.

66
00:03:27,817 --> 00:03:29,144
Oh, son of a bitch!

67
00:03:32,427 --> 00:03:35,221
Hey there have you heard about my robot friend?

68
00:03:35,362 --> 00:03:38,251
He's metal and small and
doesn't judge me at all.

69
00:03:38,329 --> 00:03:43,519
He's a cyberwired bundle of joy.
My robot friend.

70
00:03:45,029 --> 00:03:47,906
I like to dip and daddle
with my robot friend.

71
00:03:48,165 --> 00:03:51,007
He's smart as can be and emotion-free.

72
00:03:51,148 --> 00:03:56,678
And he's computin' his way to my heart.
My robot friend.

73
00:03:56,873 --> 00:03:59,750
My robot friend.

74
00:03:59,891 --> 00:04:03,378
My robot friend.

75
00:04:03,496 --> 00:04:06,290
My robot friend.

76
00:04:07,431 --> 00:04:11,279
Ohhh, that's so cute. Did you see
Butters and his friend Eric playing Robot.

77
00:04:11,318 --> 00:04:13,290
Yes. Those boys are quite imaginative.

78
00:04:13,291 --> 00:04:16,096
Leave it to them to find a fun way
to do the dishes.

79
00:04:16,544 --> 00:04:17,694
That's great AWESOM-O!

80
00:04:17,695 --> 00:04:19,517
You can carry all my laundry in one trip!

81
00:04:19,518 --> 00:04:22,781
Ah, Buttters, it's getting late.
You should be getting ready for bed soon

82
00:04:22,782 --> 00:04:24,988
Okay Mom. Well, come on,
AWESOM-O. Bedtime.

83
00:04:24,989 --> 00:04:27,218
Oh, is your little robot friend staying the night?

84
00:04:27,219 --> 00:04:29,668
Well of course he is.
He's my robot, ain't he?

85
00:04:29,669 --> 00:04:31,778
That's okay with your mom, Mr. Robot?

86
00:04:31,900 --> 00:04:33,660
AWESOM-O does not have a mom.

87
00:04:33,661 --> 00:04:35,444
Yup! Don't you know nothin' about robot?

88
00:04:35,445 --> 00:04:38,032
Come on, AWESOM-O!
You can put my laundry away!

89
00:04:38,409 --> 00:04:40,040
Aww, that's just adorable.

90
00:04:40,099 --> 00:04:43,730
It's good to see Butters finally have
a friend that wants to stay over.

91
00:04:44,161 --> 00:04:46,931
I like to brush my teeth in
the morning and at night.

92
00:04:46,932 --> 00:04:50,085
The teeth won't mind..
Jesus Christ I can't go on like this.

93
00:04:50,200 --> 00:04:54,744
Butters, remember when you said you had a
video of Eric Cartman dressed like Britney Spears?

94
00:04:54,967 --> 00:04:56,047
Oh. Yeah.

95
00:04:56,423 --> 00:04:58,018
I would like to see what he looks like

96
00:04:58,019 --> 00:04:59,780
so I can beat him up for you.

97
00:04:59,898 --> 00:05:01,151
May I see the video?

98
00:05:01,152 --> 00:05:02,883
Awww, you don't need to do
that, AWESOM-O.

99
00:05:02,884 --> 00:05:05,607
Hey, I gotta put in my suppository.
Can you help me?

100
00:05:05,608 --> 00:05:06,326
What?

101
00:05:06,805 --> 00:05:09,763
Remember I said I put that medicinal
suppository in my anus?

102
00:05:09,764 --> 00:05:12,021
It'll be so much easier havin' you
do it from now on.

103
00:05:12,022 --> 00:05:15,778
Um. Actually, AWESOM-O was not
programmed for that function.

104
00:05:16,037 --> 00:05:17,985
Haw, it's real easy.
I'll show you.

105
00:05:17,986 --> 00:05:21,013
You just take this little thingy out of
the plastic... paper, and and I'll,

106
00:05:21,014 --> 00:05:24,384
I'll pull down my pants...
and just slide it up in my anus there.

107
00:05:25,527 --> 00:05:26,462
...No way.

108
00:05:26,701 --> 00:05:30,071
AWESOM-O, I though you were programmed
to do whatever I tell you.

109
00:05:30,223 --> 00:05:30,941
Weak!

110
00:05:32,290 --> 00:05:35,200
Yeyeah, that, that's pretty good.
Get it up there good and deep.

111
00:05:35,201 --> 00:05:35,919
Lame!

112
00:05:36,469 --> 00:05:38,914
All right AWESOM-O, time
for us to get some sleep.

113
00:05:38,915 --> 00:05:41,426
Hey, you want me to teach
you some bedtime songs?

114
00:05:41,427 --> 00:05:45,113
If you leave me now, you'll take
away the biggest part of me.

115
00:05:46,399 --> 00:05:50,015
AWESOM-O must rest!
His CPU system overloading.

116
00:05:50,206 --> 00:05:53,141
Oh, o-o-all right AWESOM-O.
Let's get us some shut-eye,

117
00:05:53,399 --> 00:05:55,334
or what, or whatever robots have.

118
00:06:11,221 --> 00:06:12,938
Where is it? Where is it??

119
00:06:13,426 --> 00:06:16,784
AWESOM-O??
AWESOM-O, what the Sam Heck are you doing?

120
00:06:17,536 --> 00:06:20,812
Um, ah AWESOM-O is reorganizing
your stuff for you.

121
00:06:21,292 --> 00:06:25,097
Aw Jeez Jeez Louise! My mom is gonna be
awful sore when she sees this mess!

122
00:06:25,167 --> 00:06:27,146
Now AWESOM-O, that is a bad robot!

123
00:06:27,370 --> 00:06:30,974
You can't do no chores for me unless
I tell you to do them! You got it?!

124
00:06:30,975 --> 00:06:32,389
AWESOM-O understands.

125
00:06:32,442 --> 00:06:36,464
Now I'm gonna have to give ya a spankin',
AWESOM-O, so that you'll learn better!

126
00:06:38,069 --> 00:06:40,961
Just know, AWESOM-O,
that I did it because I love you.

127
00:06:41,070 --> 00:06:43,527
Okay, come on, let's go
make some breakfast.

128
00:06:44,136 --> 00:06:46,419
Goddamnit, I have to find that videotape!

129
00:06:49,427 --> 00:06:53,310
Look at that, AWESOM-O!
I drew a picture of us playing in a field together.

130
00:06:54,416 --> 00:06:57,198
Ah I'll be right back.
I'm gonna get some Sunny Delight.

131
00:06:57,199 --> 00:06:59,265
I would like some Sunny Delight too.

132
00:06:59,340 --> 00:07:03,656
Don't be silly, AWESOM-O.
Robots don't need to drink nothin'.

133
00:07:04,056 --> 00:07:06,956
Whoa. Uh go answer the door, AWESOM-O.

134
00:07:07,288 --> 00:07:09,136
AWESOM-O will answers the door.

135
00:07:12,138 --> 00:07:13,651
What the hell are you doing, fatass?

136
00:07:13,652 --> 00:07:16,051
Dude, are you still pretending to be a robot?

137
00:07:16,052 --> 00:07:19,851
I just need to uh make Butters think
I'm a robot for a little while longer.

138
00:07:19,852 --> 00:07:20,526
Why?

139
00:07:21,068 --> 00:07:25,292
Because I need to, all right?! I've got something
planned that's uh gonna be really sweet.

140
00:07:25,293 --> 00:07:26,750
Just play along, okay?

141
00:07:27,112 --> 00:07:27,786
Why?

142
00:07:28,017 --> 00:07:31,344
Kyle, Goddamnit, will you just do-?
Who's at the door, AWESOM-O?

143
00:07:33,701 --> 00:07:35,897
Three boys named Stan, Kyle, and Kenny.

144
00:07:36,355 --> 00:07:38,682
Ah, hey fellas! Ah I see you met my robot.

145
00:07:38,926 --> 00:07:41,600
Uh yeah, Butters, he's real cool.
Hey he sure is!

146
00:07:41,617 --> 00:07:45,900
Hey he sure is! We do everything together.
Why last night we even had a slumber party.

147
00:07:46,412 --> 00:07:47,130
Weak.

148
00:07:47,411 --> 00:07:50,010
He can do anything I command him to.
He's real smart.

149
00:07:50,011 --> 00:07:53,675
Watch this: hey AWESOM-O, will
you go get my friends some Sunny Delight?

150
00:07:53,676 --> 00:07:54,829
Yes, of course.

151
00:07:57,558 --> 00:07:59,015
Oh wait. Hey AWESOM-O,

152
00:07:59,208 --> 00:08:01,490
I'd also like some celery sticks
chopped up two inches long,

153
00:08:01,491 --> 00:08:03,644
with peanut butter and raisins on top.

154
00:08:04,348 --> 00:08:06,131
Suck mah balls, Kyle.

155
00:08:07,514 --> 00:08:08,914
He's made in Japan!

156
00:08:10,480 --> 00:08:13,729
Yes, it has just been a delight having
your son over, Mrs. Cartman.

157
00:08:13,730 --> 00:08:15,969
He and Butters are really getting along great.

158
00:08:15,970 --> 00:08:18,202
Oh, I'm so glad to hear it, Mrs. Stotch.

159
00:08:18,203 --> 00:08:20,284
Eric has been having some
emotional problems lately.

160
00:08:20,285 --> 00:08:22,568
Well, the reason I'm calling is
that Butters is supposed

161
00:08:22,569 --> 00:08:25,351
to go see his Aunt Nellie in Los Angeles
this weekend.

162
00:08:25,352 --> 00:08:29,635
The boys are getting along so well that
we were thinking of inviting Eric to go along.

163
00:08:29,784 --> 00:08:31,668
Oh, well, I'm not sure.

164
00:08:31,917 --> 00:08:34,016
Actually, Eric is still supposed to be grounded

165
00:08:34,017 --> 00:08:36,648
for trying to exterminate the Jews two weeks ago.

166
00:08:37,348 --> 00:08:39,047
Excuse me, I didn't catch that.

167
00:08:39,048 --> 00:08:40,930
Oh, but I suppose it would be good for him.

168
00:08:40,931 --> 00:08:45,631
Yes, of course he can go.
I'll bring some of clothes over.

169
00:08:45,913 --> 00:08:48,413
Maybe he put that videotape in here somewhere.

170
00:08:48,546 --> 00:08:51,328
AWESOM-O, what are you doing?
My friends are waiting for their beverages.

171
00:08:51,329 --> 00:08:52,264
Chop chop!

172
00:08:52,994 --> 00:08:54,411
Hey guys, great news!

173
00:08:54,544 --> 00:08:58,818
It's been arranged: you two are both going
to Los Angeles to visit Butters' Aunt Nellie!

174
00:08:58,819 --> 00:09:01,885
Oh boy! My robot gets to come
with me to see Aunt Nellie?!

175
00:09:01,889 --> 00:09:02,533
What?

176
00:09:02,534 --> 00:09:05,584
Oh boy, AWESOM-O!
We're gonna have the best time ever!

177
00:09:06,244 --> 00:09:07,244
Lame.

178
00:09:12,222 --> 00:09:15,155
Hey Nellie, guess what I found
scrampin' around the airport.

179
00:09:15,156 --> 00:09:16,395
Howdy Aunt Nellie!

180
00:09:16,396 --> 00:09:18,146
There's my little nephew!

181
00:09:18,280 --> 00:09:19,545
How was your flight?

182
00:09:19,546 --> 00:09:22,180
It was long. We had a three-hour delay
... departin' Denver,

183
00:09:22,181 --> 00:09:23,103
but we're here!

184
00:09:23,104 --> 00:09:24,286
Didn't ya bring any bags?

185
00:09:24,287 --> 00:09:26,469
Well, sure, but my robot is
bringin' them in.

186
00:09:26,470 --> 00:09:27,449
Your robot?

187
00:09:27,660 --> 00:09:29,993
Butters' new friend is a little strange.

188
00:09:30,410 --> 00:09:32,824
He, he really takes playing Robot seriously.

189
00:09:35,708 --> 00:09:36,730
There he is!

190
00:09:36,825 --> 00:09:38,624
AWESOM-O, this is my Aunt Nellie.

191
00:09:38,625 --> 00:09:40,604
Hello! It's nice to have you here.

192
00:09:40,707 --> 00:09:42,707
AWESOM-O must dispense oil waste.

193
00:09:43,074 --> 00:09:44,963
Where is the nearest toilet, please?

194
00:09:44,964 --> 00:09:47,063
Oh oh, right through there, Mr. Robot.

195
00:09:47,064 --> 00:09:47,999
Thank you.

196
00:09:49,229 --> 00:09:51,761
I don't think he took the costume off the entire trip.

197
00:09:51,762 --> 00:09:53,295
Well, did you wanna get right to sight-seeing,

198
00:09:53,296 --> 00:09:55,461
or are you guys hungry after such a long flight.

199
00:09:55,462 --> 00:09:57,006
Nah, I ate on the plane.

200
00:09:57,012 --> 00:09:59,576
And AWESOM-O is a robot,
so he don't need to eat.

201
00:09:59,577 --> 00:10:00,425
Right...

202
00:10:13,876 --> 00:10:14,768
AWESOM-O?

203
00:10:15,763 --> 00:10:16,979
Aw-Aw-AWESOM-O is coming.

204
00:10:16,980 --> 00:10:19,611
Come on, AWESOM-O!
We're gonna go a-sightseein'!

205
00:10:23,821 --> 00:10:26,471
I'm hangin' out in LA with my robot friend

206
00:10:26,566 --> 00:10:29,578
We're havin' such fun in the hot hot sun

207
00:10:29,672 --> 00:10:32,009
We're two of a kind- That's me!

208
00:10:32,148 --> 00:10:38,815
And my robot friend.
My robot friend.

209
00:10:38,867 --> 00:10:40,904
My robot... friend.

210
00:10:40,971 --> 00:10:43,461
Can you believe we're at a real live
movie studio, AWESOM-O?

211
00:10:43,462 --> 00:10:45,019
Aren't we havin' the best time?

212
00:10:45,020 --> 00:10:48,097
Butters, wouldn't you like to have
some time away from AWESOM-O?

213
00:10:48,098 --> 00:10:49,565
We could meet up later, perhaps?

214
00:10:49,566 --> 00:10:50,922
Hey, look over there, AWESOM-O.

215
00:10:50,923 --> 00:10:52,163
The film studio commissary.

216
00:10:52,164 --> 00:10:54,223
That's where all them rich movie producers
who come up with uh,

217
00:10:54,224 --> 00:10:57,029
Hollywood blockbusters have their lunch.
Neato, huh?

218
00:10:57,797 --> 00:11:01,145
Damnit, Mitch. How come our movie
studio can't come up with any winners?

219
00:11:01,146 --> 00:11:03,733
I mean, we're smart, right?
We're really smart.

220
00:11:03,777 --> 00:11:06,267
We need an idea for a movie that's a home run.

221
00:11:06,268 --> 00:11:08,421
A feel-good romp for the whole family.

222
00:11:09,308 --> 00:11:11,026
Hey, what's that over there?

223
00:11:11,125 --> 00:11:13,874
Wow, that's a really neat little robot
you have there, little boy.

224
00:11:13,875 --> 00:11:14,824
What's he do?

225
00:11:14,825 --> 00:11:16,934
Well, he can do anything.
Watch this

226
00:11:17,149 --> 00:11:19,748
Hey, AWESOM-O, who's gonna win
the Superbowl next year?

227
00:11:19,749 --> 00:11:21,249
The New Orleans Saints.

228
00:11:23,447 --> 00:11:24,462
Hey, Mr. Robot,

229
00:11:24,463 --> 00:11:27,879
how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

230
00:11:27,880 --> 00:11:28,815
Seventeen.

231
00:11:32,079 --> 00:11:34,662
Mitch, are you thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?

232
00:11:34,870 --> 00:11:38,803
Yeah. Maybe that robot can be
programmed to come up with movie ideas!

233
00:11:40,318 --> 00:11:41,184
Exactly!

234
00:11:41,834 --> 00:11:44,967
Gentlemen, this little boy was kind
enough to let us show you his robot.

235
00:11:44,968 --> 00:11:46,401
The AWESOM-O 4000.

236
00:11:46,624 --> 00:11:48,323
I've already seen what he can do.

237
00:11:48,324 --> 00:11:51,291
Uh, excuse me sir, but uh, that's not a robot.

238
00:11:52,189 --> 00:11:53,021
It's not?

239
00:11:53,022 --> 00:11:54,921
No, it clearly had bipedal movement,

240
00:11:54,922 --> 00:11:57,571
so the correct term is "computerized automatron. "

241
00:11:57,572 --> 00:11:59,712
Oh, very nice, Mitch.
You are the smart one.

242
00:11:59,713 --> 00:12:01,878
Well, regardless, I believe maybe this automatron

243
00:12:01,879 --> 00:12:04,379
can help us come up with new movie ideas.

244
00:12:04,652 --> 00:12:07,869
How can a robot come up with
better ideas for movies than us?

245
00:12:08,019 --> 00:12:12,286
Watch this: AWESOM-O, given the
current trends of the movie-going public

246
00:12:12,376 --> 00:12:16,659
can you come up with an idea for a movie
that will break a hundred million box office?

247
00:12:17,299 --> 00:12:19,583
Um... okay. How about this:

248
00:12:21,157 --> 00:12:23,923
Adam Sandler is like, in love with some girl,

249
00:12:24,273 --> 00:12:27,078
but then it turns out that
the girl is actually a...

250
00:12:27,240 --> 00:12:29,219
...golden retriever, or something.

251
00:12:30,913 --> 00:12:33,730
Oh, perfect!
We'll call it "Puppy Love"!

252
00:12:33,863 --> 00:12:35,829
Give us another movie idea, AWESOM-O!

253
00:12:35,830 --> 00:12:38,801
Yeah yeah! Let's hear it! Yeah,
we wanna hear it! Come on, come on!

254
00:12:38,802 --> 00:12:42,985
Okay, how about this: Adam Sandler...
inherits like, a billion dollars,

255
00:12:43,268 --> 00:12:47,285
but first, he has to, like,
become a... boxer, or something.

256
00:12:48,029 --> 00:12:51,495
...Yes, it's flawless!
Punch-Drunk Billionaire!

257
00:12:52,095 --> 00:12:54,962
Boy, Los Angeles is great, huh AWESOM-O?

258
00:12:55,014 --> 00:12:59,123
Can you believe those guys paid us
a hundred dollars apiece for those movie ideas?

259
00:12:59,171 --> 00:13:01,389
You should split that money with AWESOM-O.

260
00:13:01,390 --> 00:13:03,416
After all, they were AWESOM-O's ideas.

261
00:13:03,417 --> 00:13:05,917
Hahaa, right! What are you gonna
do with money, AWESOM-O?

262
00:13:05,918 --> 00:13:08,466
Buy some robot pants? Haha, no!

263
00:13:08,467 --> 00:13:10,427
We got each other and that's all we need, AWESOM-O.

264
00:13:10,428 --> 00:13:13,755
I'm gonna send this money to needy kids in third-world countries.

265
00:13:15,649 --> 00:13:16,779
Ye, you okay AWESOM-O?

266
00:13:16,780 --> 00:13:19,082
AWESOM-O needs to rest!
Feeling faint.

267
00:13:19,083 --> 00:13:20,510
Well you go ahead and relax, AWESOM-O.

268
00:13:20,511 --> 00:13:23,403
We've got another full day of pitching movies tomorrow.

269
00:13:26,899 --> 00:13:30,962
Gentlemen, Ladies, we all know that
we live in a time of uncertainty.

270
00:13:31,515 --> 00:13:34,581
The risk of an attack on American soil is higher than ever.

271
00:13:34,615 --> 00:13:37,562
Now, I believe we may be able to curb that risk.

272
00:13:38,244 --> 00:13:41,310
Two days ago our intelligence department
came across this:

273
00:13:43,805 --> 00:13:45,390
The AWESOM-O 4000.

274
00:13:45,473 --> 00:13:49,321
It is currently being used by Catamount Pictures to develop ideas for movies.

275
00:13:49,531 --> 00:13:54,439
Our sources say that in just one week it has
come up with over one thousand movie ideas,

276
00:13:54,732 --> 00:13:57,146
eight hundred of which feature Adam Sandler.

277
00:13:58,958 --> 00:13:59,777
That's incredible!

278
00:13:59,778 --> 00:14:04,099
You're thinking the robot could be
used to come up with anti-Islamic movies?

279
00:14:04,228 --> 00:14:06,470
No. If we got our hands on that robot,

280
00:14:06,519 --> 00:14:09,748
we could reprogram it and turn it into a weapon!.

281
00:14:11,534 --> 00:14:14,751
Uh huh. I don't see how we have a choice.

282
00:14:14,798 --> 00:14:18,109
Hold on a second: If that robot is
designed for entertainment,

283
00:14:18,175 --> 00:14:20,006
turning it into a weapon is unethical.

284
00:14:20,007 --> 00:14:23,553
Unethical? Let me explain something to you, Mr. Scientist!

285
00:14:23,630 --> 00:14:25,931
We understand that the robot is from Japan!

286
00:14:25,932 --> 00:14:28,267
That means that the Japanese have more of them!

287
00:14:28,268 --> 00:14:32,225
And if the Japanese fabricates one
of them into a weapon before we do...

288
00:14:32,345 --> 00:14:34,889
Jesus. It would be Pearl Harbor all over again.

289
00:14:34,940 --> 00:14:37,053
But worse. With robots.

290
00:14:37,284 --> 00:14:39,002
I I'm sorry, I must protest.

291
00:14:39,198 --> 00:14:43,236
We, we have no data suggesting the Japanese
have developed a robot with offensive capability.

292
00:14:43,237 --> 00:14:48,051
You're paid to think, Mr. Scientist!
National security is our jub.

293
00:14:51,534 --> 00:14:54,363
Gentlemen, we're going to Los Angeles!

294
00:14:54,535 --> 00:14:56,684
I want that robot!

295
00:14:58,857 --> 00:15:01,791
Yeah, me and my robot are still
over at the movie studio, Aunt Nellie.

296
00:15:01,792 --> 00:15:04,153
We're makin' all sorts of money for the poor.

297
00:15:04,154 --> 00:15:07,629
Movie idea number two thousand
three hundred and five:

298
00:15:08,376 --> 00:15:13,672
Adam Sandler is trapped on an island
and falls in love with a coconut.

299
00:15:14,094 --> 00:15:18,247
Great, AWESOM-O, great. Uh guys, take a break.
I need a minute alone with AWESOM-O.

300
00:15:21,417 --> 00:15:23,570
You are an incredible robot, AWESOM-O.

301
00:15:23,920 --> 00:15:28,851
I was just wondering... are you by chance a... pleasure model?

302
00:15:30,337 --> 00:15:31,185
...What?

303
00:15:31,335 --> 00:15:36,372
Well, have you been programmed
to... satisfy... urges of humans?

304
00:15:37,478 --> 00:15:39,239
AWESOM-O does not understand.

305
00:15:39,574 --> 00:15:41,292
Let me show you what I mean.

306
00:15:42,113 --> 00:15:43,918
Well yeah, we're havin' a great time, Aunt Nellie.

307
00:15:43,919 --> 00:15:45,915
These movie studio guys are real nice.

308
00:15:45,916 --> 00:15:46,656
LAME!

309
00:15:46,926 --> 00:15:50,130
Yeah, we're makin' a bunch more money.
I can't believe it either.

310
00:15:50,131 --> 00:15:52,151
NOT COOL! TOTALLY LAME!

311
00:15:53,227 --> 00:15:54,119
AWESOM-O?

312
00:15:54,647 --> 00:15:58,194
Well, I gotta go, Aunt Nellie. Ah,
AWESOM-O is havin' some kind of malfunction.

313
00:15:58,195 --> 00:15:59,956
AWESOM-O? Hey, where'd ya go?

314
00:16:08,934 --> 00:16:10,448
Let's go! Move, move!

315
00:16:10,542 --> 00:16:11,540
AWESOM-O?

316
00:16:11,612 --> 00:16:13,591
Hey, what are you doin' with him?!

317
00:16:17,067 --> 00:16:18,523
That's my robot!

318
00:16:21,877 --> 00:16:24,777
AWESOM-OOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

319
00:16:33,209 --> 00:16:35,231
Are those arm and leg locks secure?

320
00:16:35,264 --> 00:16:36,286
Secure, sir!

321
00:16:36,347 --> 00:16:39,857
Good. I don't want that robot mobile
until I know what it's capable of.

322
00:16:39,858 --> 00:16:41,358
All right, power it on.

323
00:16:46,882 --> 00:16:47,783
What the hell?

324
00:16:47,784 --> 00:16:48,863
What's going on?

325
00:16:48,864 --> 00:16:51,659
It... powered itself back on.

326
00:16:53,334 --> 00:16:55,941
Stand by. Be ready to destroy it.

327
00:16:56,728 --> 00:16:59,582
Where the hell am I?!
Hey, why can't I move?!

328
00:16:59,676 --> 00:17:02,928
Are your systems stable?
Run a systems check on your CPU.

329
00:17:02,949 --> 00:17:04,537
The fuck are you talkin' about, dude?!

330
00:17:04,538 --> 00:17:07,978
Ah, I'm sorry, robot, they want me to reprogram you.

331
00:17:08,032 --> 00:17:10,039
I'm not a robot, dumbass! I'm alive.

332
00:17:10,040 --> 00:17:13,152
What did you say?
I said I'm a real person, asswipe!

333
00:17:14,786 --> 00:17:15,960
...Oh my God.

334
00:17:16,911 --> 00:17:18,151
What's happening?

335
00:17:18,156 --> 00:17:20,434
The robot... It thinks it's alive.

336
00:17:21,338 --> 00:17:23,405
It's developed consciousness.

337
00:17:23,911 --> 00:17:25,368
What? How can that be?

338
00:17:25,525 --> 00:17:27,955
Must be a malfunction of its exographical IMS or the...

339
00:17:27,956 --> 00:17:29,141
interlaced BV system.

340
00:17:29,142 --> 00:17:32,277
Speak in a language we can understand,
Mr. Scientist!

341
00:17:32,507 --> 00:17:34,914
Your robot doesn't know it's a robot!

342
00:17:35,560 --> 00:17:37,495
Goddamnit, get me down from here!

343
00:17:39,666 --> 00:17:41,110
Who made you, robot?!

344
00:17:41,439 --> 00:17:43,200
I'm not a robot, I'm a human!

345
00:17:43,329 --> 00:17:45,177
Jesus, the scientist was right.

346
00:17:45,584 --> 00:17:47,720
But, who would have programmed it to think it was human?

347
00:17:47,721 --> 00:17:48,825
The movie studio?

348
00:17:48,826 --> 00:17:51,033
Look, retards! My name is Eric Cartman!

349
00:17:51,092 --> 00:17:53,228
I live with my mom in South Park, Colorado!

350
00:17:53,229 --> 00:17:55,397
Dear Christ, they gave it memories, too.

351
00:17:55,398 --> 00:17:56,507
Sure, why not?

352
00:17:56,642 --> 00:17:59,459
Program the memories of some
eight-year-old boy who doesn't exist,

353
00:17:59,460 --> 00:18:01,150
and make the robot think he's real!

354
00:18:01,151 --> 00:18:02,888
Makes for a lot better movies!

355
00:18:02,889 --> 00:18:06,377
I'm not reprogramming a robot
that's developed consciousness!

356
00:18:06,608 --> 00:18:08,885
Do I have to remind you of your position?!

357
00:18:08,886 --> 00:18:10,986
Don't forget you have a duty to your country,

358
00:18:10,987 --> 00:18:13,207
Mr. Scientist!!

359
00:18:13,284 --> 00:18:16,630
Scientist!! I want that robot's memories
and consciousness E-RASED,

360
00:18:16,631 --> 00:18:19,175
so we can take it back to Washington!
GOT IT?!

361
00:18:20,982 --> 00:18:22,482
Damn you all to hell!..

362
00:18:26,561 --> 00:18:31,363
Hey there, did you know I had a robot friend?

363
00:18:31,493 --> 00:18:36,801
We used to laugh and play,
but someone took him away.

364
00:18:37,019 --> 00:18:42,127
He was my ten gigahertz old pal.

365
00:18:42,397 --> 00:18:45,755
My robot friend.

366
00:18:47,606 --> 00:18:48,933
Hey, wait a minute.

367
00:18:50,677 --> 00:18:52,743
Why, that's the van that- Oh my God!

368
00:18:54,418 --> 00:18:57,659
Goddamnit, stop! I'm real! I'm real!

369
00:18:57,730 --> 00:18:59,937
It'll all be over soon, robot!

370
00:19:04,195 --> 00:19:06,295
Hang on! I'm getting you out of here, robot!

371
00:19:06,296 --> 00:19:08,449
Aw, it's about freaking time, jackass!

372
00:19:08,962 --> 00:19:10,899
What the hell are you doing?!

373
00:19:11,688 --> 00:19:13,797
Well I, I'm saving a conscious being!

374
00:19:13,836 --> 00:19:16,554
If you wanna kill it, you'll have to go through me!

375
00:19:16,723 --> 00:19:19,131
Fine. Kill that son of a bitch!

376
00:19:19,132 --> 00:19:22,808
No! Look, Goddamnit! Now I can
show you stupid assholes who I really am!

377
00:19:23,559 --> 00:19:24,545
AWESOM-O!

378
00:19:25,696 --> 00:19:27,516
I am the AWESOM-O 4000.

379
00:19:30,471 --> 00:19:34,229
No!! No, please!
Don't kill him! He's my best friend!

380
00:19:34,352 --> 00:19:36,548
He's my best friend in the whole world!

381
00:19:41,951 --> 00:19:46,225
There. You see? You want
to tell me this isn't humanity?

382
00:19:47,064 --> 00:19:50,064
Who's to judge what makes
somethng human anyway?!

383
00:19:50,244 --> 00:19:55,223
Does this make me human?!
Or this?! Or these?!

384
00:19:58,110 --> 00:20:01,374
Perhaps... there is consciousness in this robot.

385
00:20:02,041 --> 00:20:05,455
Maybe we as a society need to
realize that artificial intelligence

386
00:20:05,706 --> 00:20:09,898
...is intelligence all the same, and
we can learn from the robots.

387
00:20:10,720 --> 00:20:12,810
I think maybe one day we can all-

388
00:20:14,748 --> 00:20:17,422
Heh- wait a minute, did, did that robot just fart?

389
00:20:17,429 --> 00:20:18,929
Hey, robots don't fart!

390
00:20:19,455 --> 00:20:21,303
Uh... now ending fart sequence.

391
00:20:21,457 --> 00:20:23,131
Oh, and it, it smells, too!

392
00:20:23,171 --> 00:20:24,758
Smell sequence initiated.

393
00:20:24,922 --> 00:20:26,459
A robot with smelly farts?

394
00:20:26,460 --> 00:20:28,178
That doesn't make any sense.

395
00:20:28,210 --> 00:20:29,667
Hang on a second here!

396
00:20:34,253 --> 00:20:36,249
Would you like to touch my body?

397
00:20:36,320 --> 00:20:37,987
Come on and touch my body!

398
00:20:38,914 --> 00:20:39,942
Oooo, my hot body!

399
00:20:39,943 --> 00:20:41,787
Don't you like my hot body?

400
00:20:41,869 --> 00:20:43,630
Come on and touch my titties!

401
00:20:43,818 --> 00:20:45,362
I felt them just like???

402
00:20:45,485 --> 00:20:47,411
Come on Justin, touch my body!

403
00:20:47,512 --> 00:20:48,580
Mmm, Justin, yeah!

404
00:20:48,581 --> 00:20:50,858
Touch my body! You and me!

405
00:20:51,042 --> 00:20:52,847
Check it out, my not-hot body!

406
00:20:53,460 --> 00:20:55,186
Come on, my body!

407
00:20:55,781 --> 00:20:57,894
Wow, kid, you're a little faggot!

408
00:20:58,513 --> 00:20:59,629
Lame...