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Due to this week's tragic events
in Hawaii the "Lemmiwinks"

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episode of South Park will not be shown tonight

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Instead, we present the all new and
slightly better episode, AWESOM-O.

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AWESOM-O

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What the heck?

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Whoa! What a huge package!

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" To Butters Stotch. "
Oh boy ! It's for me ! It's for me !!

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"Sent from: Japan. Konichi-wa."

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Wow ! A package for me from Japan !!

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Wow, what can it be?
My birthday isn't until September 11th.

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Oh boy ! I've never gotten a package this big !
I've always wanted to have a huge package.

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Greetings. I am the AWESOM-O 4000.

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Whoa...

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I have been sent from Japan to serve
as your personal robot.

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You... you're my robot?

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Yes. I will be your new best friend.

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Oh wow !

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Yep. That's right. He's a real live robot.
He can walk and talk and everything.

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You're like the fourth kid I told already.

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Well I gotta go Dougie.
My robot and I have stuff to do.

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Heheh, they're all so jealous !

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I'm so glad you came into my life, AWESOM-O.
You're the best friend a guy could have.

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Yes. You can trust AWESOM-O. In fact, you should
tell AWESOM-O all your most personal secrets.

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AWESOM-O will not make fun of you or tell
your secrets to other people and stuff.

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Hey yeah ! Well I can tell you anything, huh ?

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Well lessee... Well, for one, I have
what's called a heziated colon

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which means I sometime can't control
my sphincter.

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Could be.

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Well, nobody knows it, but sometimes I poop
my pants, so I have to wear a diaper to school.

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You okay, AWESOM-O ?

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Yes. AWESOM-O is fine.
Please go on.

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Well, I have to take medicine for it every day.

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It's a little suppository I have to ...put up my rectom.

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That, that's very interesting.
Tell AWESOM-O more secrets.

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Hm, okay. Let's see

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Oh, my parents don't know, but sometimes
I get picked on by this one kid at school.

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his name is Eric Cartman, and he always
tries to play jokes on me and stuff.

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Oh, really ?

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Yeah. One time he made me think
a meteor had hit the earth,

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and convinced me to stay down
in a bomb shelter for three days.

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Heh. Wow, that sucks.

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Yeah. And then this other time, he pretended
to be me on the phone to my dad

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and called him a pussy,
so my dad came home and beat me.

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Wow. Sounds like this Cartman kid is pretty smart.

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No, he's not smart ! He's just an asshole.

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And he's never gonna play on me ever again!

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Really ? You think so ?

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Well, guess what, Butters.
I have a surprise for you.

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Yeah, and he's never gonna get me again!

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Cause what Cartman doesn't know is that I know one of his secrets !

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What ?

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When Cartman is playing all alone in his backyard,

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he likes to dress up like Britney Spears
and pretend he's her !

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Hi sings and dances around with a
life-sized cutout of Justin Timberlake.

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You saw that ?

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Yeah! And I videotaped him doing it !

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- Nuh uh.
I've got the whole thing on tape !

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Even him making out with the Justin Timberlake cutout !

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No way.

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Yeah ! And if Cartman ever messes with me again,
I'm gonna show that video to everybody !

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Then I'll lhave my revenge, boy howdy !

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...Um, where is this videotape, Butters ?

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Huh ? Oh, I dunno. It's around here somewhere.

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Hey ! So what do you wanna do now, AWESOM-O ?

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Uh, Butters, maybe you should give AWESOM-O the videotape ?

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How come ?

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Well, because... AWESOM-O can, like,
back it up for you

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, and make copies and stuff.
I am AWESOM-O.

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Oh, that's all right, AWESOM-O.
Come on! I have a lot of things to teach you.

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Oh, son of a bitch !

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Hey there have you heard about my robot friend ?

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He's metal and small and
doesn't judge me at all.

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He's a cyberwired bundle of joy.
My robot friend.

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I like to dip and daddle
with my robot friend.

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He's smart as can be and emotion-free.

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And he's computin' his way to my heart.
My robot friend.

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My robot friend.

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My robot friend.

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My robot friend.

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Ohhh, that's so cute. Did you see
Butters and his friend Eric playing Robot.

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Yes. Those boys are quite imaginative.

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Leave it to them to find a fun way
to do the dishes.

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That's great AWESOM-O!

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You can carry all my laundry in one trip!

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Ah, Buttters, it's getting late.
You should be getting ready for bed soon

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Okay Mom. Well, come on,
AWESOM-O. Bedtime.

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Oh, is your little robot friend staying the night?

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Well of course he is.
He's my robot, ain't he?

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That's okay with your mom, Mr. Robot?

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AWESOM-O does not have a mom.

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Yup! Don't you know nothin' about robot?

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Come on, AWESOM-O!
You can put my laundry away!

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Aww, that's just adorable.

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It's good to see Butters finally have
a friend that wants to stay over.

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I like to brush my teeth in
the morning and at night.

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The teeth won't mind ..
Jesus Christ I can't go on like this.

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Butters, remember when you said you had a
video of Eric Cartman dressed like Britney Spears?

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Oh. Yeah.

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I would like to see what he looks like

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so I can beat him up for you.

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May I see the video?

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Awww, you don't need to do
that, AWESOM-O.

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Hey, I gotta put in my suppository.
Can you help me?

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What?

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Remember I said I put that medicinal
suppository in my anus?

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It'll be so much easier havin' you
do it from now on.

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Um. Actually, AWESOM-O was not
programmed for that function.

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Haw, it's real easy.
I'll show you.

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You just take this little thingy out of
the plastic... paper, and and I'll,

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I'll pull down my pants ...
and just slide it up in my anus there.

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...No way.

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AWESOM-O, I though you were programmed
to do whatever I tell you.

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Weak!

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Yeyeah, that, that's pretty good.
Get it up there good and deep.

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Lame!

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All right AWESOM-O, time
for us to get some sleep.

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Hey, you want me to teach
you some bedtime songs?

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If you leave me now, you'll take
away the biggest part of me.

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AWESOM-O must rest!
His CPU system overloading.

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Oh, o-o-all right AWESOM-O.
Let's get us some shut-eye,

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or what, or whatever robots have.

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Where is it? Where is it??

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AWESOM-O??
AWESOM-O, what the Sam Heck are you doing?

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Um, ah AWESOM-O is reorganizing
your stuff for you.

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Aw Jeez Jeez Louise! My mom is gonna be
awful sore when she sees this mess!

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Now AWESOM-O, that is a bad robot!

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You can't do no chores for me unless
I tell you to do them! You got it?!

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AWESOM-O understands.

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Now I'm gonna have to give ya a spankin',
AWESOM-O, so that you'll learn better!

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Just know, AWESOM-O,
that I did it because I love you.

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Okay, come on, let's go
make some breakfast.

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Goddamnit, I have to find that videotape!

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Look at that, AWESOM-O!
I drew a picture of us playing in a field together.

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Ah I'll be right back.
I'm gonna get some Sunny Delight.

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I would like some Sunny Delight too.

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Don't be silly, AWESOM-O.
Robots don't need to drink nothin'.

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Whoa. Uh go answer the door, AWESOM-O.

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AWESOM-O will answers the door.

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What the hell are you doing, fatass?

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Dude, are you still pretending to be a robot?

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I just need to uh make Butters think
I'm a robot for a little while longer.

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Why?

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Because I need to, all right?! I've got something
planned that's uh gonna be really sweet.

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Just play along, okay?

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Why?

146
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Kyle, Goddamnit, will you just do-?
Who's at the door, AWESOM-O?

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Three boys named Stan, Kyle, and Kenny.

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Ah, hey fellas! Ah I see you met my robot.

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Uh yeah, Butters, he's real cool.
Hey he sure is!

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Hey he sure is! We do everything together.
Why last night we even had a slumber party.

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Weak.

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He can do anything I command him to.
He's real smart.

153
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Watch this: hey AWESOM-O, will
you go get my friends some Sunny Delight?

154
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Yes, of course.

155
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Oh wait. Hey AWESOM-O,

156
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I'd also like some celery sticks
chopped up two inches long,

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with peanut butter and raisins on top.

158
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Suck mah balls, Kyle.

159
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He's made in Japan!

160
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Yes, it has just been a delight having
your son over, Mrs. Cartman.

161
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He and Butters are really getting along great.

162
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Oh, I'm so glad to hear it, Mrs. Stotch.

163
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Eric has been having some
emotional problems lately.

164
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Well, the reason I'm calling is
that Butters is supposed

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to go see his Aunt Nellie in Los Angeles
this weekend.

166
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The boys are getting along so well that
we were thinking of inviting Eric to go along.

167
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Oh, well, I'm not sure.

168
00:09:14,637 --> 00:09:16,653
Actually, Eric is still supposed to be grounded

169
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for trying to exterminate the Jews two weeks ago.

170
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Excuse me, I didn't catch that.

171
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Oh, but I suppose it would be good for him.

172
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Yes, of course he can go.
I'll bring some of clothes over.

173
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Maybe he put that videotape in here somewhere.

174
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AWESOM-O, what are you doing?
My friends are waiting for their beverages.

175
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Chop chop!

176
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Hey guys, great news!

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It's been arranged: you two are both going
to Los Angeles to visit Butters' Aunt Nellie!

178
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Oh boy! My robot gets to come
with me to see Aunt Nellie?!

179
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What?

180
00:09:45,254 --> 00:09:48,304
Oh boy, AWESOM-O!
We're gonna have the best time ever!

181
00:09:48,386 --> 00:09:50,369
Lame.

182
00:09:54,717 --> 00:09:57,517
Hey Nellie, guess what I found
scrampin' around the airport.

183
00:09:57,651 --> 00:09:58,717
Howdy Aunt Nellie!

184
00:09:58,891 --> 00:10:00,641
There's my little nephew!

185
00:10:00,775 --> 00:10:01,808
How was your flight?

186
00:10:02,041 --> 00:10:04,675
It was long. We had a three-hour delay
...departin' Denver,

187
00:10:04,815 --> 00:10:05,465
but we're here!

188
00:10:05,599 --> 00:10:06,665
Didn't ya bring any bags?

189
00:10:06,782 --> 00:10:08,749
Well, sure, but my robot is
bringin' them in.

190
00:10:08,965 --> 00:10:09,749
Your robot?

191
00:10:10,155 --> 00:10:12,488
Butters' new friend is a little strange.

192
00:10:12,905 --> 00:10:15,188
He, he really takes playing Robot seriously.

193
00:10:18,203 --> 00:10:19,003
There he is!

194
00:10:19,320 --> 00:10:20,936
AWESOM-O, this is my Aunt Nellie.

195
00:10:21,120 --> 00:10:22,953
Hello! It's nice to have you here.

196
00:10:23,202 --> 00:10:25,202
AWESOM-O must dispense oil waste.

197
00:10:25,569 --> 00:10:27,135
Where is the nearest toilet, please?

198
00:10:27,459 --> 00:10:29,293
Oh oh, right through there, Mr. Robot.

199
00:10:29,559 --> 00:10:30,193
Thank you.

200
00:10:31,724 --> 00:10:33,957
I don't think he took the costume off the entire trip.

201
00:10:34,407 --> 00:10:35,724
Well, did you wanna get right to sight-seeing,

202
00:10:35,791 --> 00:10:37,707
or are you guys hungry after such a long flight.

203
00:10:37,957 --> 00:10:39,374
Nah, I ate on the plane.

204
00:10:39,507 --> 00:10:41,341
And AWESOM-O is a robot,
so he don't need to eat.

205
00:10:42,072 --> 00:10:42,789
Right...

206
00:10:56,371 --> 00:10:57,171
AWESOM-O?

207
00:10:58,375 --> 00:10:59,342
Aw-Aw-AWESOM-O is coming.

208
00:10:59,475 --> 00:11:01,725
Come on, AWESOM-O!
We're gonna go a-sightseein'!

209
00:11:06,316 --> 00:11:08,966
I'm hangin' out in LA with my robot friend

210
00:11:09,061 --> 00:11:12,073
We're havin' such fun in the hot hot sun

211
00:11:12,167 --> 00:11:14,504
We're two of a kind- That's me!

212
00:11:14,643 --> 00:11:21,310
And my robot friend.
My robot friend.

213
00:11:21,362 --> 00:11:23,399
My robot ...friend.

214
00:11:23,466 --> 00:11:25,880
Can you believe we're at a real live
movie studio, AWESOM-O?

215
00:11:25,957 --> 00:11:27,264
Aren't we havin' the best time?

216
00:11:27,515 --> 00:11:30,405
Butters, wouldn't you like to have
some time away from AWESOM-O?

217
00:11:30,593 --> 00:11:32,033
We could meet up later, perhaps?

218
00:11:32,211 --> 00:11:33,241
Hey, look over there, AWESOM-O.

219
00:11:33,418 --> 00:11:34,570
The film studio commissary.

220
00:11:34,659 --> 00:11:36,630
That's where all them rich movie producers
who come up with uh,

221
00:11:36,719 --> 00:11:38,801
Hollywood blockbusters have their lunch.
Neato, huh?

222
00:11:40,292 --> 00:11:43,525
Damnit, Mitch. How come our movie
studio can't come up with any winners?

223
00:11:43,641 --> 00:11:45,958
I mean, we're smart, right?
We're really smart.

224
00:11:46,272 --> 00:11:48,588
We need an idea for a movie that's a home run.

225
00:11:48,763 --> 00:11:50,647
A feel-good romp for the whole family.

226
00:11:51,803 --> 00:11:53,170
Hey, what's that over there?

227
00:11:53,620 --> 00:11:56,286
Wow, that's a really neat little robot
you have there, little boy.

228
00:11:56,370 --> 00:11:57,186
What's he do?

229
00:11:57,320 --> 00:11:59,303
Well, he can do anything.
Watch this

230
00:11:59,644 --> 00:12:01,994
Hey, AWESOM-O, who's gonna win
the Superbowl next year?

231
00:12:02,244 --> 00:12:03,477
The New Orleans Saints.

232
00:12:05,942 --> 00:12:06,775
Hey, Mr. Robot,

233
00:12:06,958 --> 00:12:09,975
how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

234
00:12:10,375 --> 00:12:11,191
Seventeen.

235
00:12:14,574 --> 00:12:17,157
Mitch, are you thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?

236
00:12:17,365 --> 00:12:21,298
Yeah. Maybe that robot can be
programmed to come up with movie ideas!

237
00:12:22,813 --> 00:12:23,679
Exactly!

238
00:12:24,329 --> 00:12:27,363
Gentlemen, this little boy was kind
enough to let us show you his robot.

239
00:12:27,463 --> 00:12:28,896
The AWESOM-O 4000.

240
00:12:29,119 --> 00:12:30,586
I've already seen what he can do.

241
00:12:30,819 --> 00:12:33,786
Uh, excuse me sir, but uh, that's not a robot.

242
00:12:34,684 --> 00:12:35,250
It's not?

243
00:12:35,517 --> 00:12:37,300
No, it clearly had bipedal movement,

244
00:12:37,417 --> 00:12:39,784
so the correct term is "computerized automatron."

245
00:12:40,067 --> 00:12:42,017
Oh, very nice, Mitch.
You are the smart one.

246
00:12:42,208 --> 00:12:44,308
Well, regardless, I believe maybe this automatron

247
00:12:44,374 --> 00:12:46,874
can help us come up with new movie ideas.

248
00:12:47,147 --> 00:12:50,364
How can a robot come up with
better ideas for movies than us?

249
00:12:50,514 --> 00:12:54,781
Watch this: AWESOM-O, given the
current trends of the movie-going public

250
00:12:54,871 --> 00:12:58,721
can you come up with an idea for a movie
that will break a hundred million box office?

251
00:12:59,794 --> 00:13:02,078
Um... okay. How about this:

252
00:13:03,652 --> 00:13:06,418
Adam Sandler is like, in love with some girl,

253
00:13:06,768 --> 00:13:09,352
but then it turns out that
the girl is actually a ...

254
00:13:09,735 --> 00:13:11,252
...golden retriever, or something.

255
00:13:13,408 --> 00:13:16,225
Oh, perfect!
We'll call it "Puppy Love"!

256
00:13:16,358 --> 00:13:18,208
Give us another movie idea, AWESOM-O!

257
00:13:18,325 --> 00:13:20,341
Yeah yeah! Let's hear it! Yeah,
we wanna hear it! Come on, come on!

258
00:13:21,297 --> 00:13:25,480
Okay, how about this: Adam Sandler...
inherits like, a billion dollars,

259
00:13:25,763 --> 00:13:29,780
but first, he has to, like,
become a ...boxer, or something.

260
00:13:30,524 --> 00:13:33,990
...Yes, it's flawless!
Punch-Drunk Billionaire!

261
00:13:34,590 --> 00:13:37,457
Boy, Los Angeles is great, huh AWESOM-O?

262
00:13:37,509 --> 00:13:40,914
Can you believe those guys paid us
a hundred dollars apiece for those movie ideas?

263
00:13:41,666 --> 00:13:43,756
You should split that money with AWESOM-O.

264
00:13:43,885 --> 00:13:45,717
After all, they were AWESOM-O's ideas.

265
00:13:45,912 --> 00:13:48,319
Hahaa, right! What are you gonna
do with money, AWESOM-O?

266
00:13:48,413 --> 00:13:50,961
Buy some robot pants? Haha, no!

267
00:13:51,043 --> 00:13:52,781
We got each other and that's all we need, AWESOM-O.

268
00:13:52,923 --> 00:13:55,577
I'm gonna send this money to needy kids in third-world countries.

269
00:13:58,207 --> 00:13:59,181
Ye, you okay AWESOM-O?

270
00:13:59,275 --> 00:14:01,577
AWESOM-O needs to rest!
Feeling faint.

271
00:14:01,655 --> 00:14:02,888
Well you go ahead and relax, AWESOM-O.

272
00:14:03,006 --> 00:14:05,119
We've got another full day of pitching movies tomorrow.

273
00:14:09,394 --> 00:14:13,457
Gentlemen, Ladies, we all know that
we live in a time of uncertainty.

274
00:14:14,010 --> 00:14:16,699
The risk of an attack on American soil is higher than ever.

275
00:14:17,110 --> 00:14:20,057
Now, I believe we may be able to curb that risk.

276
00:14:20,739 --> 00:14:23,593
Two days ago our intelligence department
came across this:

277
00:14:26,300 --> 00:14:27,885
The AWESOM-O 4000.

278
00:14:27,968 --> 00:14:31,784
It is currently being used by Catamount Pictures to develop ideas for movies.

279
00:14:32,026 --> 00:14:36,934
Our sources say that in just one week it has
come up with over one thousand movie ideas,

280
00:14:37,227 --> 00:14:39,141
eight hundred of which feature Adam Sandler.

281
00:14:41,603 --> 00:14:42,214
That's incredible!

282
00:14:42,273 --> 00:14:46,594
You're thinking the robot could be
used to come up with anti-Islamic movies?

283
00:14:46,723 --> 00:14:48,965
No. If we got our hands on that robot,

284
00:14:49,014 --> 00:14:52,243
we could reprogram it and turn it into a weapon!.

285
00:14:54,029 --> 00:14:57,246
Uh huh. I don't see how we have a choice.

286
00:14:57,293 --> 00:15:00,604
Hold on a second: If that robot is
designed for entertainment,

287
00:15:00,670 --> 00:15:02,279
turning it into a weapon is unethical.

288
00:15:02,502 --> 00:15:06,048
Unethical? Let me explain something to you, Mr. Scientist!

289
00:15:06,125 --> 00:15:08,286
We understand that the robot is from Japan!

290
00:15:08,427 --> 00:15:10,587
That means that the Japanese have more of them!

291
00:15:10,763 --> 00:15:14,720
And if the Japanese fabricates one
of them into a weapon before we do...

292
00:15:14,840 --> 00:15:17,294
Jesus. It would be Pearl Harbor all over again.

293
00:15:17,435 --> 00:15:19,548
But worse. With robots.

294
00:15:19,779 --> 00:15:21,469
I I'm sorry, I must protest.

295
00:15:21,693 --> 00:15:25,614
We, we have no data suggesting the Japanese
have developed a robot with offensive capability.

296
00:15:25,732 --> 00:15:30,546
You're paid to think, Mr. Scientist!
National security is our jub.

297
00:15:34,029 --> 00:15:36,858
Gentlemen, we're going to Los Angeles!

298
00:15:37,030 --> 00:15:39,179
I want that robot!

299
00:15:41,352 --> 00:15:44,041
Yeah, me and my robot are still
over at the movie studio, Aunt Nellie.

300
00:15:44,287 --> 00:15:45,943
We're makin' all sorts of money for the poor.

301
00:15:46,649 --> 00:15:50,124
Movie idea number two thousand
three hundred and five:

302
00:15:50,871 --> 00:15:56,167
Adam Sandler is trapped on an island
and falls in love with a coconut.

303
00:15:56,589 --> 00:16:00,323
Great, AWESOM-O, great. Uh guys, take a break.
I need a minute alone with AWESOM-O.

304
00:16:03,912 --> 00:16:05,978
You are an incredible robot, AWESOM-O.

305
00:16:06,415 --> 00:16:11,346
I was just wondering... are you by chance a ...pleasure model?

306
00:16:12,832 --> 00:16:13,184
...What?

307
00:16:13,830 --> 00:16:18,867
Well, have you been programmed
to... satisfy... urges of humans?

308
00:16:19,973 --> 00:16:21,464
AWESOM-O does not understand.

309
00:16:22,069 --> 00:16:23,514
Let me show you what I mean.

310
00:16:24,758 --> 00:16:26,332
Well yeah, we're havin' a great time, Aunt Nellie.

311
00:16:26,414 --> 00:16:28,234
These movie studio guys are real nice.

312
00:16:28,411 --> 00:16:29,151
LAME!

313
00:16:29,421 --> 00:16:32,004
Yeah, we're makin' a bunch more money.
I can't believe it either.

314
00:16:32,626 --> 00:16:34,646
NOT COOL! TOTALLY LAME!

315
00:16:35,722 --> 00:16:36,297
AWESOM-O?

316
00:16:37,142 --> 00:16:39,549
Well, I gotta go, Aunt Nellie. Ah,
AWESOM-O is havin' some kind of malfunction.

317
00:16:40,690 --> 00:16:42,075
AWESOM-O? Hey, where'd ya go?

318
00:16:51,429 --> 00:16:52,943
Let's go! Move, move!

319
00:16:53,037 --> 00:16:54,035
AWESOM-O?

320
00:16:54,107 --> 00:16:55,293
Hey, what are you doin' with him?!

321
00:16:59,562 --> 00:17:01,018
That's my robot!

322
00:17:04,372 --> 00:17:07,272
AWESOM-OOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

323
00:17:15,398 --> 00:17:17,242
Are those arm and leg locks secure?

324
00:17:17,453 --> 00:17:18,263
Secure, sir!

325
00:17:18,536 --> 00:17:22,011
Good. I don't want that robot mobile
until I know what it's capable of.

326
00:17:22,047 --> 00:17:23,021
All right, power it on.

327
00:17:29,093 --> 00:17:29,868
What the hell?

328
00:17:29,973 --> 00:17:30,830
What's going on?

329
00:17:31,053 --> 00:17:33,848
It... powered itself back on.

330
00:17:35,523 --> 00:17:38,130
Stand by. Be ready to destroy it.

331
00:17:38,917 --> 00:17:41,771
Where the hell am I?!
Hey, why can't I move?!

332
00:17:41,865 --> 00:17:45,117
Are your systems stable?
Run a systems check on your CPU.

333
00:17:45,201 --> 00:17:46,621
The fuck are you talkin' about, dude?!

334
00:17:46,727 --> 00:17:50,167
Ah, I'm sorry, robot, they want me to reprogram you.

335
00:17:50,221 --> 00:17:52,112
I'm not a robot, dumbass! I'm alive.

336
00:17:52,229 --> 00:17:55,341
What did you say?
I said I'm a real person, asswipe!

337
00:17:56,975 --> 00:17:58,149
...Oh my God.

338
00:17:59,100 --> 00:17:59,793
What's happening?

339
00:18:00,345 --> 00:18:02,623
The robot... It thinks it's alive.

340
00:18:03,527 --> 00:18:05,594
It's developed consciousness.

341
00:18:06,100 --> 00:18:07,403
What? How can that be?

342
00:18:07,714 --> 00:18:10,028
Must be a malfunction of its exographical IMS or the...

343
00:18:10,145 --> 00:18:11,166
interlaced BV system.

344
00:18:11,331 --> 00:18:14,466
Speak in a language we can understand,
Mr. Scientist!

345
00:18:14,696 --> 00:18:17,103
Your robot doesn't know it's a robot!

346
00:18:17,749 --> 00:18:18,947
Goddamnit, get me down from here!

347
00:18:21,855 --> 00:18:23,299
Who made you, robot?!

348
00:18:23,628 --> 00:18:25,248
I'm not a robot, I'm a human!

349
00:18:25,518 --> 00:18:26,927
Jesus, the scientist was right.

350
00:18:27,773 --> 00:18:29,640
But, who would have programmed it to think it was human?

351
00:18:29,910 --> 00:18:30,708
The movie studio?

352
00:18:31,015 --> 00:18:33,222
Look, retards! My name is Eric Cartman!

353
00:18:33,281 --> 00:18:35,148
I live with my mom in South Park, Colorado!

354
00:18:35,418 --> 00:18:37,438
Dear Christ, they gave it memories, too.

355
00:18:37,587 --> 00:18:38,585
Sure, why not?

356
00:18:38,831 --> 00:18:41,532
Program the memories of some
eight-year-old boy who doesn't exist,

357
00:18:41,649 --> 00:18:43,235
and make the robot think he's real!

358
00:18:43,340 --> 00:18:45,008
Makes for a lot better movies!

359
00:18:45,078 --> 00:18:48,566
I'm not reprogramming a robot
that's developed consciousness!

360
00:18:48,797 --> 00:18:50,969
Do I have to remind you of your position?!

361
00:18:51,075 --> 00:18:53,047
Don't forget you have a duty to your country,

362
00:18:53,176 --> 00:18:55,396
Mr. Scientist!!

363
00:18:55,473 --> 00:18:58,714
Scientist!! I want that robot's memories
and consciousness E-RASED,

364
00:18:58,820 --> 00:19:01,274
so we can take it back to Washington!
GOT IT?!

365
00:19:03,171 --> 00:19:04,193
Damn you all to hell!..

366
00:19:08,750 --> 00:19:13,552
Hey there, did you know I had a robot friend?

367
00:19:13,682 --> 00:19:18,990
We used to laugh and play,
but someone took him away.

368
00:19:19,208 --> 00:19:24,316
He was my ten gigahertz old pal.

369
00:19:24,586 --> 00:19:27,944
My robot friend.

370
00:19:29,795 --> 00:19:30,429
Hey, wait a minute.

371
00:19:32,866 --> 00:19:34,792
Why, that's the van that- Oh my God!

372
00:19:36,607 --> 00:19:39,848
Goddamnit, stop! I'm real! I'm real!

373
00:19:39,919 --> 00:19:42,126
It'll all be over soon, robot!

374
00:19:46,384 --> 00:19:48,333
Hang on! I'm getting you out of here, robot!

375
00:19:48,485 --> 00:19:50,423
Aw, it's about freaking time, jackass!

376
00:19:50,530 --> 00:19:52,467
What the hell are you doing?!

377
00:19:53,806 --> 00:19:55,649
Well I, I'm saving a conscious being!

378
00:19:55,954 --> 00:19:57,974
If you wanna kill it, you'll have to go through me!

379
00:19:58,527 --> 00:20:01,028
Fine. Kill that son of a bitch!

380
00:20:01,346 --> 00:20:05,022
No! Look, Goddamnit! Now I can
show you stupid assholes who I really am!

381
00:20:05,773 --> 00:20:06,759
AWESOM-O!

382
00:20:07,910 --> 00:20:09,730
I am the AWESOM-O 4000.

383
00:20:12,685 --> 00:20:16,443
No!! No, please!
Don't kill him! He's my best friend!

384
00:20:16,566 --> 00:20:18,598
He's my best friend in the whole world!

385
00:20:24,165 --> 00:20:28,439
There. You see? You want
to tell me this isn't humanity?

386
00:20:29,772 --> 00:20:31,862
Who's to judge what makes
somethng human anyway?!

387
00:20:31,952 --> 00:20:37,000
Does this make me human?!
Or this?! Or these?!

388
00:20:40,225 --> 00:20:43,489
Perhaps... there is consciousness in this robot.

389
00:20:44,206 --> 00:20:47,565
Maybe we as a society need to
realize that artificial intelligence

390
00:20:47,689 --> 00:20:51,881
... is intelligence all the same, and
we can learn from the robots.

391
00:20:52,703 --> 00:20:54,793
I think maybe one day we can all-

392
00:20:56,731 --> 00:20:58,786
Heh- wait a minute, did, did that robot just fart?

393
00:20:59,662 --> 00:21:01,036
Hey, robots don't fart!

394
00:21:01,688 --> 00:21:03,425
Uh... now ending fart sequence.

395
00:21:03,690 --> 00:21:05,204
Oh, and it, it smells, too!

396
00:21:05,404 --> 00:21:06,649
Smell sequence initiated.

397
00:21:07,155 --> 00:21:08,658
A robot with smelly farts?

398
00:21:08,693 --> 00:21:10,137
That doesn't make any sense.

399
00:21:10,443 --> 00:21:11,687
Hang on a second here!

400
00:21:16,486 --> 00:21:18,482
Would you like to touch my body?

401
00:21:18,553 --> 00:21:20,220
Come on and touch my body!

402
00:21:21,147 --> 00:21:21,922
Oooo, my hot body!

403
00:21:22,176 --> 00:21:24,020
Don't you like my hot body?

404
00:21:24,102 --> 00:21:25,511
Come on and touch my titties!

405
00:21:26,051 --> 00:21:27,507
I felt them just like ???

406
00:21:27,718 --> 00:21:29,644
Come on Justin, touch my body!

407
00:21:29,745 --> 00:21:30,720
Mmm, Justin, yeah!

408
00:21:30,814 --> 00:21:33,091
Touch my body! You and me!

409
00:21:33,275 --> 00:21:35,071
Check it out, my not-hot body!

410
00:21:35,693 --> 00:21:37,419
Come on, my body!

411
00:21:38,014 --> 00:21:40,127
Wow, kid, you're a little faggot!

412
00:21:40,526 --> 00:21:41,642
Lame...