Thames Television announcer; organist, announcer, Hermit; The British Show Biz Awards presented by Her Royal Highness the Dummy Princess Margaret, the remains of Sir Alan Whattle, new suit sketch, lemon curry, the Oscar Wilde Sketch `Your majesty is like a stream of bat's piss'; animation- lady powders nose, Charwoman!; more awards, David Niven's fridge, Pier Paolo Pasolini's The Third Test Match; Mrs. Zambezi gets a new brain; man wants to donate urine; wife swapping play by play, formation wife swapping, Grandstand- coverage of wife rugby; credits of the year; more Show Biz awards, The Dirty Vicar Sketch `I like TITS!'